My husband and I have been together for over twenty years. In the last eight or nine years he has been constantly on drugs, from one job to another, never pays bills. He pays a max of $400 a month, if that, and he makes between $700 and $900 on an average paycheck ONCE A WEEK. I have been struggling for years to pay bills; I have fibromyalgia so I recently bought an adjustable bed to help ease the pain (which he has paid nothing on) and my father gave me a loveseat. I want to get a divorce. I also want to move out. If I move out and take my bed, my loveseat (letting him keep the other, larger couch), my TV, my fridge (we have two fridges, he can keep the other one), the deep freezer, my stove, my dresser and my microwave and washer and dryer, but I let him KEEP the house as well as most of the other stuff in there, will the judge turn around and tell me we have to split everything I did take 50/50, even if he gets the house and the rest of the stuff? Will moving out and taking the few things I want or need affect my court proceedings for divorce? We live in Washington State so it's a no-fault divorce state as well as communal property state. I just want to know my options in moving out and filing for divorce.

Me and my husband have been married for over a year now, and I feel like his mom is going to ruin our marriage. We had our own place for a while, literally right across the street from his moms house, and she would walk in like its nothing. She even brought her laundry at our place to wash clothes. Every single time we come over, she always asked my husband to do something. One time he was on his knees trying to mop her floors because she asked to. She blames me for "not" feeding him, or feeding him too much. (I cook him healthy meals everysingle day). Other than that, She tells him to mow her lawn, break her branches off her tree, etc. (She's only 40 years old, and she goes clubbing ALOT so she is very active.). She even told my husband to paint his little sisters walls. Im currently pregnant, and he doesnt even want to paint our unborn sons room so why would he want to paint his little sisters room just because his mom asked. And now he's telling me that he wants to paint our unborn sons room ONLY because he would feel guilty if he painted his sisters room and not our sons room. Idk if maybe im just being selfish and I know thats his mom and all,but I just feel if this keeps on going, she will never leave him alone and i just think that in the end it'll ruin our marriage. I just want ur opinions on my situatin and if anyone is going thru this.

lo. I am asking this question on behalf of my parents. Just over two months ago my sister, their daughter died suddenly leaving behind two daughters (2 & 4 years old). My parents saw them at least 3-4 times a week before she died. She was unhappily married and wanted to eventually get a divorce. Since her death, her husband's mother moved into their home and now acts as "mother". The husband has restricted my parents contact with their granddaughters which is absolutely devastating for them and continuously says he has no obligation to them (my parents) or his now deceased wife. However when we are able to visit with them, the older daughter, 4 years old, talks about how her grandmother (the husband's mother) "paddles" her and that her daddy smacks her. The husband also has anger issues and has broken and objects in front of the two young children. When she was alive, my sister would tell me how husband has threatened my sister with violence and emotionally abused her on a constant basis. She wanted to finish her schooling, get a job and divorce him. My sister also had a severe distaste for her mother in law and always said how she was very cruel to her. We're all heartbroken and need advice. I have researched grandparents rights but need help Thank you.

To love your partner, or to be loved ?

I have a friend who is from the Bahamas and his married to a US resident. She is really nasty and treats him like a slave. Literally. She's brought up divorce and ever brought the paper work and had him sign it, but has never filed it yet. They hardly talk, don't sleep in same room, she expects him to cook all the time and gets mad when he doesn't, she calls him evil names, so on and so on... If he leaves and goes to live with a US friend is he going to get deported because he's not with his wife!??? PLEASE HELP.

Friend of mine is from HK and this guy is a US citizen, he married a woman in Philippine but now he wanted to marry my friend in WA without getting divorce as it will cost him a lot of money. Can immigration find out that he is married if he is trying to marry my friend in state or it is something that the immigration won't know until someone report it? What would happened if he get caught after marrying my friend? Will she get deported? Trying to marry someone over in US while the guy has a wife in Philippines.?

Who is faithful, loves sex often, is responsible ( no drugs), low partner count, doesn't have any addictions, around 25-30, without going to church ? Thanks !

I used to never yell or scream and just let people walk all over me. But lately when I get really bad anxiety (usually when we're driving, stuck in traffic, or lost) we start yelling and screaming violently at each other and I throw or hit stuff near me. That's not normally my personality at all. I feel really bad afterwards and I don't want to be a ***** to my husband. I just have really bad anxiety and it happens. What can I do to keep calm and stop screaming, even when he starts screaming at me? Btw it's not like we're always fighting or something. It's only when I have an anxiety attack and neither of us hit each other. It's just yelling then getting really depressed.

We were married for 7 years and divorced a little over a year ago. I miss him and took him for granted. He s getting married September... should I tell him how I feel or move on?

I don't know what I'm asking here, do you think this is "friend" material or are we both kidding ourselves?

I am giving my soon to be ex-wife $3,000 a month in child support. She still keeps asking me to pay half of the medical bills, half of the school supplies, half of the Softball fees and equipment costs, etc. What exactly is the purpose of child support if she keeps asking me to pay half of everything?

I want to know more.

I recently had a baby, he s now 4 months. My mom takes care of him because my husband and I work. The issue I have been coming into is my mom gets excited and goes and buys him things, which I appreciate... but I want to be the first to experience things with him and see his reactions. Maybe its selfish of me.. I m not sure ... Should I tell her something? I dont want her to feel bad... Am I just being selfish... yes this is my first baby and it gets me excited to get him things. My husband blows up about it with me too and I m not sure how to address him... Any thoughts.

I found out from my phone bill that my wife has been texting 2 other men. One was an ex boyfriend from her teenage years and the other is a mutual friend of ours. her ex lives about 3 hours away & our friend has moved about 7 hours away.She has told me in the past that if something were to happen to me she would be on our friends doorstep. What bothers me the most is that when I checked her phone the text to both men were deleted. she has plenty of old text on the phone by why would she delete the ones from these 2 men?

And not that I am an adult how can I reply to my mother so I am no longer bothered by the grief she gives me when I see my step-mother? The step-mother came along later as my mother divorced my father. Thank you all for the excellent answers. I have been realizing how much my mother burdens me with her bitterness even though he does not intend to (she doesn't think). She is otherwise a very good mother.

I feel like being married when it is sincere and true can be such a beautiful everyday moment and connection, a lifetime commitment. I come from a religious background where marriage primarily is the only halal way for Men and Women to have a relationship. It seems that nowadays the essence of relationships are being listed and replaced with voids , one or both individual is missing and they're focused on anything else in the relationship aside from "love" I do not believe love has a certain timing at when you can and can not want or desire marriage.

My wife is pretty with a nice hourglass shape. Anyway, she told me her supervisor at work wrote a long report about her mistakes and gave it to her boss. The boss didn't even mention it to my wife, but her job description changed to being a receptionist. He told her he likes her personality and will leave her there. What worries me is he fired her colleagues for making mistakes. He also said, I hope you like me. He's handsome and wealthy. Do you think he fancies my wife?

she was thin when they met but past years has been neglectful of her health. Husband came home and found empty pizza boxes and ice cream boxes and said he had enough. He said he doesn't want to date someone who will be 300lbs in 10 years. This really happened to my dear friends. It's crazy we though they were perfect. It's difficult giving advice to two people you care deeply about with these circumstances. I told them get professional help...was that the right thing?

My husband admitted to me when we were engaged that he had an Ashley Madison profile and showed me that he deleted is (he deactivated the account in front of me) and he said he d never do it again. About a week ago I found the app on his phone he s made with a fake email address. He told me that I downloaded it...and then said "I did it because I was mad at you." Then said he d never do it again. This morning, I checked his phone s pictures and found photos of himself in the deleted photos and a woman s chest in lingerie. I haven t confronted him about it this time, but I am at a loss for what to do about this. He lies to me about everything, including drug use, and where he is when he claims he s at work. I want to talk to a friend or family member about this but every time I do it backfires and gossip goes wild.

Do you prefer for your wife to initiate sex with you, or do you like initiating better ? Also, what is more pleasurable for you, a bj or actual intercourse ?

having a hard time understanding women... my wife is away and we were talking on face time i felt like being Intimate with her. not even overtly sexual but just fool around like we had done many times before. for some reason she became shy and didnt want to do anything with me her husband... i felt disappointing but i didnt feel it was a big deal, what ever. she asked me is i was mad and i said no just disappointing and that she shouldn't feel shy from her husband and why she wasnt shy the times before. she became very upset at me saying that if we are married i shouldn't expect her to do that over the camera, even though she never protested before to any extent, and now she is a conservative person and do i think that if she dose that it means that she dosnt love me etc. idk am i in the wrong here? i didnt force her and she is my wife am i not allowed to ask her for intimacy ? i dont know what i did wrong :(

Yesterday I wrote a question and got many helpful answers. My question was regarding my husband's child mother receiving $700 a month in child support and asking us to pay for school supplies. Even though I agree with my husband and $700 a month should get the child school supplies. I didn't want my step daughter to go without. Me and my husband have a 4mon old son and I've been raising my 2yr old niece, my children don't need or even want for nothing so I felt we had to pay for these things. My husband makes decent money and I make really good money so it's not completely about the money. Anyway he agreed and asked his ex to text the school list and she refused! She said she wanted to go shopping with him bc she wanted to make sure he got everything their child needed. My husband refused, him and his ex doesn't get along.Anyway I don't understand this women he doesn't want to buy the school supplies and now she demanding to go with him or she won't give him the list. I know I can go to the school and get the list but this seems to be more about something else and less about school supplies. What is this about? I dont believe she's attempting to get my husband back or anything me and him have been together 5yrs and she also moved on and been with a couple of bf. Is this about control or what's her problem. My husband would never agree to shop w her every time their together it's always a big argument. I'm unsure what this is about???

I'm starting to think, I am the problem. I'm wondering if he is thinking about other women before he has sex with me, and he gets himself all worked up then we have sex, and that causes him to last only one minute, what else could it possibly be? It is very selfish to me when he does that, now i have to go to bed all worked up, this has been going on for at least a year.

My husband comes from a broken home and has no positive male role models and the same goes for the majority of his friends, my husband left his phone at home because he was running late for work and forgot it, he has an iPhone and I see a text message pop up and it's one of his friends saying how his wife is being a ***** just like yours, so then I open the phone up which I know is wrong and read the messages and I see that whenever we have an argument he talks negatively to his friends about me and his friends give him terrible advice and I was disgusted by some of the things said lik one friend is hiding assets to make sure his wife won't get anything if they divorce and my husband was agreeing that it was a great idea and I see that a week after I gave birth to my daughter he had told his friend that he hates being a family and he wants to leave and that was 3 years ago so he's still here and I threatened to leave him once after he said some violent hateful things to me and he cried like a baby when I left for two days. My parents have been married for 30 years and the first thing she told me after my wedding was not to talk negatively about my spouse to my friends and here he is doing that and taking advice from someone whose also never had a father or seen what a marriage is but if i confront him then he knows I went through his phone

Should i feel guilty that I masturbate since I'm not getting much action anyways. Don't think my wife cares anyways since she doesn't like sex that much. She says let's have sex 2-3 times a week, but it never happens...just a bunch of talk but never any action. My right hand has become my best friend.

We fight. Like all married couples do. The main difference is, I want resolution when we have a disagreement or argument. I don't care who's right or wrong, I just want to find a solution so it doesn't happen again. Her, on the other hand, has to be right. I'm always in the wrong and it's always my fault. She can do whatever she wants and never accepts that it's not necessarily right. Examples: She had an affair. Apparently, it wasn't just a one and done, oops thing, either. She lied to me about it, even when confronted about it. When I finally got her to admit she was doing it, she blamed me for it. She has never apologized for it, or for lying about. She even got upset at me because she wanted to remain "friends" with her lover. She lost my car keys. She had them. She misplaced them. Yes, I was annoyed at it. (We just got the car and don't have a spare set yet). She yelled at me and told me that I need to be more responsible with my keys. If the kids break something, and I get upset about it, it's my fault for being upset. On the rare occasion that she does apologize, she'll do it again within a few days. (She'll apologize for spending money we don't have, but do it again as soon as it's paid off.) But if I bring up her repetitive behavior, and it appearing she's not sorry, she gets upset at me. I feel like I'm in a lose-lose relationship. she refuses to go to marital counseling. any ideas on what I can do? Been there: I appreciate your insight, but I think due to the limits of the site, I had to cut my question short. I'm a bit confused by your answer. I never said I get angry, I get upset. Am I not supposed to get upset at these things? So I'm not real sure what you meant by your answer in regards to that portion.

this past month it seems like everything does not agree with him. He stopped drinking soda pop altogether because he said it makes him pee a lot. The it went to O.J. then it went down the list and now he stopped drinking water. Same with his food, he will stop eating things because it doesn't agree with him. Over all we live in a small town and there is no more options for me to feed him lunch or send him to work with drinks because nothing agrees with him. I tried to mo to the Doctor but he wont go says there is nothing wrong that it is the food or drinks. I am at a lost he what's bottle water now but if that makes him sick or pee a lot there is nothing else:(

Ok so my ex did me dirty and file 4 custody after I allowed our son to go stay.for the school year.And after a Christmas our son told him he wanted to come bk home. So 2 months later he disappears and when school came bk around I file for child support...Now we came to an agreement to having him most of school year. And because I file for child support he came and said was taking my son bk.

My husband pays alot of money in child support a little over $700 a month (I know many men/women who pay alot less). Anyway my step child's mother asked us to pay for school uniforms and supplies. We use to split alot of my step child's cost, but about a yr and a half ago she filed for child support. My husband was told by the judge not to give her money or anything bc it's considered a gift. Anyway we both make good money and it's possible for us to pay, but my husband's totally against it. He believes he pays more then enough and his child's mother gets food stamps, free day care, and free healthcare. Me and my husband have a new baby and we're raising my niece (I've been raising her since she was born). We get none of those things for free. We also have his child three days a week (night and day-we all live in the same school district). I see my husband's point he pays alot in child support and we have two others to think about, but she needs school supplies. My husband's not heartless he just tired of paying child support and out of pocket. We bought her shoes and summer clothing this year. Any opinions or advice? Should we pay for those things?

my wife and i have a 5 year old son together and she is currently 6 months pregnant. she is a stay at home mom and has no formal education or had a job before. we had a pre-nup before we married so she can't get alimony from me. anyways i caught her cheating on me with another woman. so when i divorce her of course they are going to give me custody of the kids because she will be homeless since she has no job, money or family to go to. anyways how much can i get her to pay in child support?