Family: Question: My family is evil? how to react?

Question: My family is evil? how to react?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 01:53 PM PDT

in my 20's, my family turned on me and destroyed my life- they did some unspeakable horrible things to me. Unforgivable stuff. But they put me thru so much trauma, i couldn't cope. I couldn't get away from them. I spent years just suffering more it seems- it seems other predators just took advantage of me. my family also continued abusing me in diff ways thruout the years- in weird crazy ways and they treat me as if im just a punching bag. My sister just had her 2nd baby, and my brother just had one too. Odd how these people who've done so much evil to me, are married, babies, but im still single and suffering. How can someone cope with this--despite all their abuse ive still been nothing but nice to them...what would you do about people this sick..

Question: What to do with a inconsiderate dad?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 01:52 PM PDT

On the outside he seems like a ok guy. A happy garbageman who each week donates 30$ to charity, he allways speaks inhumanly gentle and goes to church every sunday. But he don't care enough about his poor 15 year old daughter. I only get 10$ in allowance, if I want more, take a job! Wanna dress sexy? Sorry he don't buy me sexy clothes, take a job and save up myself! Want makeup? Save up. He wastes 30 dollars aweek on others, yet I don't get more than 10! And he plans to adopt a philippinian kid! Why should I be happy he is "saving" a life at the cost of my life?

Question: Are my parents to over protective?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 01:49 PM PDT

I'm 13. Here are the rules. 1. I'm not allowed to wear sleeves or above the knees. 2. They expect straight A's. 3. My bedtime is 8. 4. No hanging out with friends. 5. No sleepovers. (Even at family!) 6. No talking or texting guys. 7. No bikinis or anything that shows my stomach. 8. No going on feild trips that keep me away overnight. 9. Iv never been to summer camp. 10. I'm not allowed to wear makeup until college. 11. I'm not allowed to drink too much Pepsi. Do you think they are over protective.

Question: My friends mum is an alcoholic and drug addict and her dad is a drug addict- what can I say to help?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 01:48 PM PDT

My friend told me that she is scared her mums suffers from alcoholism and drug abuse and her dad suffers from drug abuse as well. She told me that her dad used to beat up her mum when she was younger until recently and she's watched this from as young as she can remember. Her parents are still together. I don't know what to say to help? She told me not to tell anyone but I don't know what to do? She's 22. What should I say?

Question: Does my dad have some mental illness? I'm asking this seriously?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 01:46 PM PDT

This isn't a rant or a question just trying to get sympathy, I'm asking this because I REALLY want to know if he has something wrong with him so I can understand why he acts the way he does. Anyway, hes the type of person that's never wrong. If anyone points out that he has a problem, then he'll immediately make you think you're the one with the problem. I remember one time when I was like 8 we went to a ski park. (My parents divorced when I was about 5) He wanted me to try snow tubing so I went down once and got scared so I didn't wanna go again. He got mad and said I would either have to go 3 times or I was paying for the tickets. Then I tried skiing. Some guy came and helped me because he saw my dad yelling at me, and after a while I tried it by myself. I went up the ski lift and somehow I fell and the skis were so big on me I was stuck. The next lift hit me in the head and I passed out, and woke up with a huge bump on my head that was bleeding. My dad yelled at me and told me I made an *ss out of myself, and yelled at me for crying. I used to think that kind of behavior was normal but now I know it's not. Growing up I was kind of a weird/backwards kid and now I know why. My dad always did this stuff to me. When I'd go to his house for weekends and cried because I missed my mom, he'd yell at me, hit me, and call me names like "moron" and "retard". He'd also talk really horribly about my mom to me, ever since I can remember.

Question: Help please, did something Idk what to do?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 01:39 PM PDT

SO I am 15 and my half sister is 16, she recently came over for the weekend. So it was the last night she was staying and she got home from baby sitting and she said she had to change because I was going to use the rest room. So my hormones kicked in and I set up my phone so she couldn't see it, I recorded my sister naked and I jerked off to it like 3 times. I felt ind of guilty but Idk it's like I was so curious and it wouldn't stop. So that night when she went to sleep I went in her room and felt her *** and ****. I got really brave and lifted up the blankets and her shirt. I felt her **** whole and her ***. It felt so good and I just couldn't stop. I put her shirt down and kept squeezing her ***. She woke up but I told her I was getting a charger and she believed me, no questions. After that I left and never said anything. I feel really guilty and I've deleted the video because I felt bad but should I text her, call her, wait and tell her? I don't know if I should and she might not understand. I've heard that it's common for boys my age to do things like this because of puberty and what not. Please Help.

Question: My mom offered me to try hookah?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 01:29 PM PDT

Me and my mom as well as a bunch of my friends and her friends went to this beach bar and they decided to smoke hookah and she also offered for me to smoke it. I am really worried, is that ok? She is really against smoking and all that. I am a teenage girl.

Question: Is being ticklish a genetic trait in family?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 01:13 PM PDT

My girlfriend has a very ticklish butts especially in certain spots, later I just found that her little brother has quite ticklish butts as well especially in the same certain spots as those of his sister

Question: Do you think it's okay for my mom to call me a *****?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 01:10 PM PDT

It started with her coming into my bathroom where I was slightly annoyed and whined mom why can't you nock on the door? Then she started cursing like Jesus ******* Christ and oh my ******* God and walked out. Keep in mind we were getting ready to go out to breakfast where we would meet my dad. Then she yells at me that we need to go. So I get my stuff from my room and she is yelling at me for not being prepared and that I am so annoying. Which I kinda expected because I did take out my annoyance on her. (Which is wrong and I know that.) After I get my stuff I apologized to her saying that I was annoyed with my friend and that I ams sorry I took out my anger on you. Then she starts yelling at me that my apology was not enough. Fast forward to when we are in the car my Mom starts saying to not call her mom that I am not her daughter anymore. Then she says that I am such a *****. Which angered me a lot and I asked what did you say. Then she said you heard me a *****. So I started to record this because every time she curses at me she denies ever cursing at me that I am a liar. She ended up calling me a ***** twenty times while in a 25 min drive. When we get to the restaurant we get a table and wait for my dad arrive. When my dad arrives she starts telling my Dad I don't give a **** and I'm never nice. Then when we get home I explain to my dad what happened. My mom then comes to my room and yells its my fault she said I was a ***** and that I am a liar.

Question: My friend confided in me she was going to trick her boyfriend into getting her pregnant...?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 12:58 PM PDT

I know this is wrong. They are both 20 and far too young to be parents..she said she wants to have a baby with him but he wants to join the military and then become a paramedic and is not ready fro kids...she said they use condoms but she is also suppose to me on Birth control..she said she is going to poke holes in teh condoms and stop taking her birth control....I feel horrible she would do something like this but not sure its my business.. should i tell??? Is it just me or is this incredibly wrong?? She said she is worried when he goes in the military he will dump her...I like him and he is a nice dude..

Question: My mother won't let go of mistakes I made in high school, how do I forgive her and get her to forgive me?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 12:52 PM PDT

I am 23 and in high school I was unmotivated. I was sent away to a boarding school for the 2nd half of high school and did okay but not great. After high school I told my parents I was working and by summer's end they found out I was lying. I was kicked out of the house and homeless. From that low point in September of 2012 I have rebuilt my life. However, my mother has not forgiven me and my father gives limited acknowledgment that I am better. My mother tells her siblings how I am a liar but it has been 3 years since I stopped the lying. She tells me people how I chose to fail in school and while some of that is true I was extremely anxious all the time and my lack of motivation was me trying to get away from the anxiety, not just being lazy. The lying was to avoid getting caught for this (though no doubt my lying was wrong). I know work hard, 5-6 days a week, but my mother makes no acknowledgement of that. She seldom calls me and sees me for two days once a year. She is constantly with my older sister, the golden one, and praises her on Facebook like she is God. There is no doubt my older sister is a good person and did better as a kid then me however it hurts me greatly that my mother favors her and thinks of me as trash. I am a 23 year old woman and my older sister is 31. I have a brother who is 25 and he is the "other kid" who is not bad but not God either. He also has anxiety but behaved much better. He is close to our Dad but my mother resents that he is nice to enemies of hers, myself included. So how can I solve this as I would like to be loved again and I am not all innocent in this but I have to explain somehow how much my mother hurt me to trust her again along with apologizing for my role in it.

Question: My mother is a narcissist at times, what causes this in people?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 12:51 PM PDT

She is not a severe narcissist but when her bitterness takes her over she becomes narcissistic. Her parents were not at all this way so I don't know how it happened to her.

Question: Dad and Stepmom having a baby very soon and I m not so sure how I feel about it?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 12:26 PM PDT

Please help me. The baby is coming in a week and I am so nervous. I know they are going to love it more than me. Has anyone been in the same situation? I feel like all they talk about is how happy and excited they are. I m 13. Please help

Question: Just finished a program, have certifications, found a job, now homeless and my mother is threatening to kick me out and refusing to help?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 12:25 PM PDT

Question: I am moving to California. How can I kill 9 neon tetras without taking them out of the tank until they are dead? I am moving tomorrow?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 12:24 PM PDT

Question: Do you think my dad is being too overprotective?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 12:20 PM PDT

My dad is always hesitant to let me stay home alone for a few hours whenever he leaves and I am the only one there. It's very annoying because I am an 18 year old male turning 19 in two months. I am a legal adult who is old enough to live on my own. Another thing is that he has no reason to not trust me. I always abide by my parents rules. I don't party, do drugs, hang out with the wrong crowd, etc. I wash dishes, do laundry, take the trash out, etc. without being asked. I always did really well in school and am currently going into my second year of college on a full scholarship. I even spent my freshman year in college living on campus on my own and looking forward to going back next year, but yet he still doesn't trust me to stay home alone. He has told me countless times what to do in case someone tries to break in our house and I know what to do but he is still hesitant to let me stay home alone. I just feel as though I am a very responsible young man and at my age my dad should loosen up a little bit.

Question: How come everytime I tell my mom something she tells everyone she possibly can.?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 12:19 PM PDT

I've basically given up on telling her anything because she just uses it as something to talk about. And she wonders why I won't tell her anything.

Question: In your opinion, if a mom said that her daughter is sick, is she a controlling B or a loving mom?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 12:14 PM PDT

Question: Hi. I am Donald Trump. Someone asked me if I am physically attracted to my own daughter Ivanka and I do not know how to respond.?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 12:14 PM PDT

If I say "no. I am not physically attracted to Ivanka," then people will think I am a homosexual and they will not vote for me, because Ivanka is really really pretty. However, if I say "yes. I am physically attracted to Ivanka," then people will think I am a creeper. I do not know how to respond to this incredibly difficult question.

Question: My friends mum is an alcoholic and drug addict and her dad is a drug addict- what can I say to help?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 12:09 PM PDT

My friend told me that she is scared her mums suffers from alcoholism and drug abuse and her dad suffers from drug abuse as well. She told me that her dad used to beat up her mum when she was younger until recently and she's watched this from as young as she can remember. Her parents are still together. I don't know what to say to help? She told me not to tell anyone but I don't know what to do? She's 22. What should I say?

Question: Is my dad actually cheating?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 12:06 PM PDT

So for the past few weeks I've noticed a change in my home life and in my dad's behavior. He just seemed to be more secretive and was a lot more irritable with my mom. Idk why I felt this, but for the longest time I kept wondering if he was being unfaithful. So one night, I waited until he fell asleep, took his phone, and looked a bit. I felt bad b/c it was a total violation of his personal space but I had to know. (WARNING: SEXUAL REFERENCES) The messages I did see had some rather mature things being spoken of. For instance, my dad asked a girl what it was like when a guy cums during oral, in which she responded with a pretty detailed explanation of how she felt when a guy cums in her mouth. My dad responded with "thats arousing" and she replied with "i also like like when guys masturbate. Turns me on." My dad then messaged back "ive never let anyone watch," and then asked if she ever did a group thing and he described this porn vid he watched. When I saw this, I was crushed and I cried the whole night. I told my brother and he said that I shouldn't worry and that hes probably just curious and doesnt mean what hes saying. I want to believe this, but I also saw dms of him trying to convince her to move to our state and that he'd love to meet her one day. He also has a snapchat, and is snapping w/ others, which I never knew about, as he always actd dumb whn I talked about the app. Hes a 50 y/o who has been married for 24 yrs. Is this considered cheating? Is this wrong?

Question: Horrible relationship with my mom. Need help.?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 11:58 AM PDT

Me and my moms relationship is super strange, I'm just gonna say the major points. She used to heavily drink (openly) 5ish years ago, she then got arrested for a DUI and had to go to AA meetings for a year and whatever else. She now continues to get drunk and yell at me and pass out just like she used to and I absolutely hate her for it. She knows what she put my brother and I through and how hard it was but she still does it for herself when s*** gets tough. She is also dating her boss. Yup. He never comes over and tip toes around me because I'm uncomfortable with the situation. She yells at me about it and blames her unhappiness on my "unwillingness" to let her integrate him into my life when he's the one who refuses to come over. They fight and break up constantly then she tells me how she's depressed and how suicidal she is and her whole drinking thing picks up too, then they get back together and she's fine. Tonight she didn't come home, didn't even tell me where she was or anything until 11pm. And she said she'd be home. And if I bring my feelings about this up to her tomorrow she will yell at me and call me a manipulative little b. What do I do? If anything?

Question: My father has been in my life & more helpful than my mother she won t let me stay with him & it s not fair I m 16 what do I do ?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 11:47 AM PDT

Question: How to I stop my mom from going off on me about little things? (Read details)?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 11:45 AM PDT

Sometimes my mom gets in to one of those moods that if one thing pisses her off, she ll rant about all my life mistakes and how I m a worthless lazy human being. For example, one day I forgot to make my bed. She comes into my room, notices my messy bed, and starts screaming about how I m an extremely messy person and that people will never respect me because of that along with other unrelated problems. Mind you, I m a straight A student and do most of the things she tells me. I usually just be quiet untill she finishes her rant, but her horrible mood lasts the whOle day and ruins my mood. What can I do to calm her or help stop her? I m not a perfect daughter and she really needs to understand that.

Question: Why doesn't my mom want to see me?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 11:42 AM PDT

My mom was wild as a teenager, typical wild party girl type. She had me at 15. When I was 5 she moved out and I've seen very little of her since. Now that I'm 16, I guess I just wanna get to know her more. I keep offering to drive out to Indianapolis( I live in Chicago) and see her, but she always has an excuse. Why doesn't she want to see me? My dad's theory is that to her, I am a constant reminder of what caused her to miss out on part of her youth. Not sure how I can be at fault though, I'm not the one who had a son at 15.

Question: Boys stare at me for hours straight?? IM CREEPED OUT!!?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 11:28 AM PDT

10th grade: A boy in French class stares at me for the whole entire time. Eyes dillated and he looks like he wants to eat me. He is 16 and so am i. In 11th grade same in English class. WHY DO THESE BOYS STARE AND STARE?? ITS WEIRD!

Question: Mean mentally abusive man in my life. Please help me?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 11:23 AM PDT

This this man and I want to get rid of him. He's mean. He calls me porky and pats my head like I'm a dog to get me upset. He takes amusement in my anger and tries to manipulate everything around me. He lies. He accuses me of hurting him and slapping him. He just told my mother I threw a cup of water at him when really he attacked me and took tape my mothers friend wanted from my hand. I came up stairs sobbing and petting my cat and he goes "Karma is a *****." and then walks away. He makes me want to kill myself. This forty six year old man is my mothers boyfriend of almost two years in September. I want him gone. He hurts me so much inside. I tell my mother and she doesn't believe me. 😭😭😭😭😭 please help me

Question: How do I discipline my brother?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 11:02 AM PDT

My mother used to let him use the tablet and the laptop all the time. Until I told her to limit his time on it. You see, he's becoming anti social and all that because of this. If you take the laptop or tablet away he'll start screaming and crying at the top of his lungs. He learns nothing, but stupid things on the internet. Stupid phrases from stupid youtubers. I took away his tablet and laptop just now and he started yelling and threatening to hit me. He's 7. So I currently have him writing "I will never be bad again" on paper until I tell him to stop. I also told him not to turn the TV on and leave the door open so he can reflect on his actions. I'm not sure if this is good enough and how long I should make him do this. Any suggestions on how to discipline him would be great!

Question: Can I stay with my step father without my biological mothers permission at 17, almost 18?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 11:00 AM PDT

I am 2 months from being 18 and I want to move in with my step father. I see him as my biological father, and I love him the same, but my mom wants me to move in with her because they're getting divorced soon.

Question: To move or stay?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 10:48 AM PDT

My husband got a job offer at a company that he has been dying to work for. It would be a good career move for him and it would make us very happy-I would be SO happy to see him happy, and there are plenty of jobs for me in the same area and I love a new challenge. The problem is that it is 22 hours from where we currently live. Its something we both want and it would be a great experience for us to make memories and try new things and build a life together out there. We are both in our upper 20's and without children, but we live very close to family (both his and mine are less than 10 minutes away currently). Living close to family has problems all of its own as far as family over stepping their bounds, my mother particularly and she has bipolar which makes matters worse. I am afraid of leaving my dad and my sister to deal with the aftermath if we do choose to go? I am also afraid of how much I will miss them as we are very close. I know we can skype and planes are doable but it is a very big change and have grown up to value family very much. My husband and I are absolutely torn. We feel like we have to choose between two great things and its such a gray area as far as what is right for our family (him and I). Has anyone had similar experiences? Update: I also may have not been clear and just wanted to help explain so that I wasn't misleading in my earlier question. My husband and I have a great relationship, we have each others backs no matter what and where he goes I go, and vice versa. He is also very worried about missing out on his family. He's especially worried about missing out on watching the nieces and nephews grow up.

Question: Why does it hurt so much more when family insults us then when someone else does?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 10:42 AM PDT

For example when my brother and my Mom's sister (my aunt) got mad at me I wanted to kill myself. When a friend of my mother's got annoyed with me I could have cared less. Also when my mother's sister hurts her feelings she refuses to forgive unless profound amends are made. Whereas my mother's neighbor spread rumors my mother let teens drink in her house (all false claims) and my mother forgave the woman and moved on

Question: How do I get people in my family to like me?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 10:41 AM PDT

Question: Is it normal for an aunt to get mad at a niece or nephew? I have had one aunt on each side of the family do this?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 10:41 AM PDT

Both times it is over social mistakes I have made as I have anxiety and ADHD socially so I mess up some. I was in my 20's both times.

Question: I'm fifteen. Can I decide which parent to live with?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 10:37 AM PDT

I argue with ny dad everyday. I've been telling him I want to live with my mom since they divorced when I was seven but he doesn't care. He wouldn't let me talk to mom before I got my own phone at 13. She lives in Virginia. She has a great job, a house, and is a way better parent. I've always been closer with my mom. I have depression symptoms. He doesn't even bring me to the doctors unless I call my mom to ask her to make him bring me. I literally had to sleep with a badly sprained foot in fifth grade because he wouldn't drive me the 5 miles to the 24 hour ER. At the beginning of the year I got sick (first few days of school) and the nurse assumed it was anxiety. he believed her. I was throwing up, crying because my chests burned so much whenever I talked, and couldn't even stand up the next day without nearly fainting. At my moms she gets the medicine out at the first complaint of a stomach ache. My dad manages a nursing home and my mom manages a store. I'm also very close with my siblings that live with my mom and my moms family. I don't even know my dads brother (he lives less than 15 min from us) but I know my moms college roommate. My mom trusts me to go buy some snacks from the store with her debit card and I'm not even aloud to open the front door even when my dads here. I just hate my life living with him so much

Question: I Told My Niece SANTA is not REAL!!!!?, now she gone syco.?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 10:07 AM PDT

im 18 and i'm looking after my niece who is 7. i told her santas not real and explained how she gets her presents and who eats the cookie... anyway i didnt think she would take it that bad, but she cant stop crying and she keeps breaking stuff around the house. shes going mad... her parents are coming back tomorrow morning. they're gonna kill me when they find out whats happened. I was just being honest to her one day she was gonna find out santa is a load of bs. how do i calm this syco down.. right now i locked her in her room and shes still going crazy swearing at santa and breaking all the toys she got last Christmas. i might just make a run for it now... im scared :/ I phone my girlfriend for advice (cause shes a teaching assistant and works with kids), hoping she would know what to do but all she did was give me a ear full of how "dumb and careless" i was and apparently this is all my fault and not my niece's. what do i do now? i tried to bribe her with money to not tell her parents but she didn't want it. WTF

Question: Indie Meadow or India Meadow?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 10:02 AM PDT

Which name goes best with twin sister Zara Suede and older sister Sutton River and brother Capsian Reef?

Question: 17y/o F I want to be emancipated but I can't afford the cost of living while attending my senior year?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 09:42 AM PDT

My parents and I recently moved from a really small town to a much larger city and I really like the place I live now but my mom is constantly emotionally abusing me. I am a 3.8 student, I do all of my chores, I have a part time job, I volunteer, and I never talk back to my parents but my mom's side of the family is really dysfunctional and whenever she's in a bad mood she screams in my face about things I didn't even do. Sometimes she'll give me chores and I'll do everything she asked me to do and I still get in trouble. My mom is constantly swearing at me and calling me things like "Dumba**", "Stupid", "Idiot", and "sh*thead". I just can't take it anymore. I want to leave so badly but I can't afford to and the rest of my family that lives in town has the same types of problems because they were all raised the same as my mom. I still have my senior year of high school to go through and I'm not really sure what to do or where to go because I can't afford to move out but my mom manages to ruin almost every day of my life. I just want to be treated like a human being. This has been going on since I was very young and I don't think anything is going to change. My dad knows about all of this but he never does anything to help me. I can't move out of town. I moved here in February and I have made lots of really great friends and without them I don't know how I could have dealt with this. I just don't know what to do. Please help.

Question: How much am i going to take home after uncle sam takes his cut.?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 09:40 AM PDT

Im 19 years old and i get paid $15.5/hr and i get paid weekly. Im going to be working 46 hours everyweek so thats 6 hours of overtime at $23.25/hr (i think). I still live at home with my parents and im still on their insurance. Im just curious on how much are they going to take out.

Question: My mom saw my porn?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 09:31 AM PDT

She didn't get mad about me or anything but this is what happened. She wanted a recipe for something and needed my phone. I was watching porn last night and I forgot to close the tabs. When she went into Safari, she closed the tabs and got her recipe. She didn't mention that it happened but I know she did because private browsing was still on and she was using it. How do I get this off of my mind? Also, where it says "My mom saw my porn", doesn't mean I was in one, I was watching porn.

Question: Can i take my mom to court for my cat?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 09:08 AM PDT

So im moving out and my mom isnt happy at all that i am and she wont let me take my cat can i take her to court she said that she bought her yes she did but she bought her as a present for me and she does not have any proof she did buy her she also says im the one who was buying the cat litter and cat food but she dont have any proof for that stuff either and i have proof that my mom has always considered her MY cat if i took her to court what would happen

Question: How do I handle painful flashbacks to my parents divorce now that I am an adult and out on my own?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 08:54 AM PDT

As a kid my mother partially (not completely) alienated me from my Dad. Now as an adult I am close to my Dad. So now a days if there is a holiday or family event I miss on my Dad's side I feel enormous guilt feeling like it is 10-15 years ago when my mother barred me from all holidays on my Dad's side ages nine to fourteen. She barred me due to her anger at my Dad. She stopped when my counselor rebuked her. So I am 25 now and still to this day if I miss an event like Thanksgiving on my Dad's side I feel like it is my childhood all over again. I feel guilty and sad and it wrecks the day. However, I live two hours from my Dad so sometimes miss stuff and my step-mother overlooks me on invitations sometimes. So how do I overcome these painful flashbacks to the 5 years my mother alienated me and the shame I felt at having divorced parents? Also my mother used to insult my Dad to me all the time. She still does some though not as much. When she does this I get flashbacks of guilt that I believed her when I was a kid and thus was awkward around my Dad, now I am fine with him

Question: How do I break the bad habits my mother passed down to me?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 08:53 AM PDT

My mother taught me that if I am upset with someone I have to bash them to others. I have to treat dislike as hate and if someone is out (I'm upset with them) then I have to consider them evil. I also have to push onto others my dislike for people I am mad at and get others on my side. So now I am an adult and I do the same thing. I have a craving to always have at least one person who is the "out" the one I bash daily. How do I break this habit passed down by my mother?

Question: Please help me decide what is the right thing to do in this situation.?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 08:53 AM PDT

When I got married I was just out of college and had a $51,000 dollar student loan debt. My husband Jack worked a lot of overtime hours to payoff that student loan debt. That was several years ago. Jack is not my ex husband. We remained on friendly terms after our divorce. I recently received an inheritance and I think I have a moral obligation to pay back Jack some or all of the money he used to pay off my student loan debt. My friends and family tell me I am crazy to do this. They say I don't owe him anything. It is a husband's duty to pay off his wife's debts. I am confused. Can someone tell me what is the right thing to do in this situation.

Question: Why does my grandfather call my brother and I kids?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 08:52 AM PDT

I'm 30 years old and my younger brother is 23. We both are adults, even if we would appear extremely young to an older man in his 80s we are far from kids. Yet every time we visit him he will say something like "Hey kids!". Well the other day we were seeing family and he says something like "yeah you know going out to dinner can be expensive, you know these kids will order expensive deserts" and points at us while he says that. So I finally step in and say "You do realize I'm 30 years old right? I'm a grown man with a college degree, my own job, and my own house, I really don't think I'm a kid anymore" So of course he says I'm still just a kid. I understand I look young to him but I mean come on how is 30 on any level a kid? I really would like him to start seeing me more as an adult then a kid. I haven't been a "kid" in over 10 years.

Question: Daughter acting completely immature.?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 08:46 AM PDT

My daughter is 27 years old. We don't like the idea of her driving 12 hours to our house when she comes to home to visit my husband flys down then will drive her car up for her. She gets really angry at him. Today we are riding back with her after her visit. She drove 4 hours then we insisted she pull over. To me, 4 hours is enough driving for one person. She absolutely flipped out at us. Pulled into a gas station screamed at us "you want to f-cking drive here" and threw the keys at us. Now all she's telling us from the back seat is "shut up" every single time we try to speak to her. This is very childish behavior and I'm extremely angry. I was ready to leave her at the gas station that's how angry I was. What should we do? I refuse to let her drive the 12 hours on her own. It's too much for anyone to handle. What does everyone think?

Question: I can't stand my mom?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 08:42 AM PDT

My mom acts like a 12 year old. If someone disagrees with her or has a different opinion, she throws a temper tantrum and ignores me and my siblings for several days. She is also incredibly unsupportive of the things I do. When I was 13, she insisted that I quit the school play because I didn't get the lead. She's done stuff like this countless times before. I'm also kind of fat and she is constantly reminding me. Lately I've been eating healthy and exercising but that's still not enough for her because I'm not skinny yet. Before I go to pool parties and I'm wearing a two piece she says stuff like " do you really want to wear that in front of your friends?" Like YES because I know they won't judge me like you do. Also she gets angry at me if I buy a size large and says stuff like "that's really your size? That's pretty bad." She is so concerned about our family image and she thinks of me as a disappointment because I'm not perfect. I'm a good kid. I'm very grateful of what my parents do for me, and I constantly remind them. Also I get awesome grades, I'm polite to others, and I don't spend all of their money. I'm 16 years old and I cant wait to go to college so I can be away from my parents. My dad isn't as bad, but he doesn't care about me and he clearly favors my older sister over me. I'll pay them back for college and I'll help pay for their retirement, but after that, I want them out of my life. Wish I didn't feel this way. How do I make these next 2 years easier?

Question: My mom acts like a child?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 08:26 AM PDT

My mom has the personality of a 12 year old. If she doesn't get her way, or if someone disagrees with her, she throws a tantrum and ignores me and my sisters for several days. Like if she suggests we go somewhere she wants to go, but we politely say we don't want to go, she gets angry and throws a tantrum. She also is super unsupportive of me. She told me I should quit the school musical when I was 13 because I didn't get the lead. She also calls me fat all the time. If I wear a two piece to a pool party she's always like "are you sure you want to be wearing that in front of your friends?". Recently I've been eating healthy and exercising but she still thinks I'm fat and gets mad at me if I buy a size large. All she cares about is having a "perfect family" image and it's so annoying and phony. Despite my long rant, I'm super grateful for what my parents do for me and I constantly remind them. I give them hardly any trouble. I get really good grades, I don't argue, and I don't spend their money but my mom still thinks I'm a disappointment because I'm not perfect.

Question: I just found out my sister is only my half sister, what do I do?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 08:26 AM PDT

A few years ago my older sister who was only 18 years old and had downsyndrome passed away. And a few days ago I found her death certificate and it was blank where it said father. I asked my cousin about it and she told me the whole story. That my sister was actually my half sister.

Question: How do i convince my dad to let me have my own room. i am turning 14 in august and i dont have a room?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 08:25 AM PDT

Question: My Dad and Mom got a reverse mortage and now my mom is loosing their home. My dad passed away a few years ago why would?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 07:57 AM PDT

Question: Would it be rude and disrespectful to my husband to do this?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 07:57 AM PDT

My parents are throwing a birthday party for my sister today and taking her out to eat at a rather pricey restaurant. I already promised I'd go. My husband may not have the money for both of us to go, so he said he may just pay my way and he would stay home. If I go without him, would it be disrespectful to him?

Question: What should I do?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 07:39 AM PDT

My dad spends money on things we don't need. He could barely afford to pay rent and he taking abut getting a sail boat. We have other things to worry abut for example the famly cat is not spayed. She terrorizes me when I get home form volunteering at the animal shelter. Then he blames it on me " stop showing fear he says" he thinks spaying cats only jeeps them form getting pregnant. Anyway this year he buys and ex box one and that puts us more in to debit. He says how he is in deit but h buys more things we don't need. How do I tell my dad that we don't need thes things. What should I do? *About I'm 16 and my dad won't let me get a job

Question: Guest is over staying her welcome?!?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 07:38 AM PDT

My mom's sister came to visit for 1 week, so my room being the closest to the bathroom, it's naturally the guest room. I don't like that arrangement, because I have to share a room with my little sister and she's very strict about whatever I do in there (I cannot mistakenly leave my shoes out of place nor can I use her study desk or pencils), and it's very uncomfortable. I cannot go into my room at all, and I can never be alone to think or meditate or anything besides going in the bathroom (which I can never stay in for long) because my aunt is always around and I just want my privacy because I'm growing up and I just want to be by myself sometimes). I can't do anything I want to do because I always have to serve her and check up on her to make sure she's not wasting water or anything. I've waited a week painfully. Today, my dad asked my mom how long my aunt will be staying and she said that she will be keeping her for another freaking month!! What do I do??? How do I cope??

Question: How do I handle painful flashbacks to my parents divorce now that I am an adult and out on my own?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 07:10 AM PDT

As a kid my mother partially (not completely) alienated me from my Dad. Now as an adult I am close to my Dad. So now a days if there is a holiday or family event I miss on my Dad's side I feel enormous guilt feeling like it is 10-15 years ago when my mother barred me from all holidays on my Dad's side ages nine to fourteen. She barred me due to her anger at my Dad. She stopped when my counselor rebuked her. So I am 25 now and still to this day if I miss an event like Thanksgiving on my Dad's side I feel like it is my childhood all over again. I feel guilty and sad and it wrecks the day. However, I live two hours from my Dad so sometimes miss stuff and my step-mother overlooks me on invitations sometimes. So how do I overcome these painful flashbacks to the 5 years my mother alienated me and the shame I felt at having divorced parents? Also my mother used to insult my Dad to me all the time. She still does some though not as much. When she does this I get flashbacks of guilt that I believed her when I was a kid and thus was awkward around my Dad, now I am fine with him

Question: My brother is a felon and a druggy. Should I advise my parents to stop doing favors for him?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 07:04 AM PDT

I know they love him but they are enablers. he is 23 and needs to grow up He is in jail right now but when he gets out I know they will return to believing his lies and doing favors. Only thing they refuse him is cash. They give him whatever else he needs including a car.

Question: Is it wrong for us to kick our 19-year-old out of the house because we are expecting twins?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 07:03 AM PDT

We have a 3-bedroom house. We have a 19yo son, 13yo and 11yo daughter. Son has his own room, daughters share. Our agreement with our son was that he could live with us rent-free, as long as he stayed out of trouble, works a job, AND goes to college. Which he has been doing diligently the past year. He goes to college part-time (which we pay for it), gets straight A's and works full-time. He has an used car that we bought him last year that is in good condition to help him with the commute. My wife and I found out 2 weeks ago that she is 2 months pregnant with twins. Which is a shocking (but happy) surprise because for the past 10 years, doctors told us that we couldn't have anymore kids. We are beyond thrilled about this surprise. We have no way we could fit two cribs (or any other baby stuff) in our bedroom. We came to the decision to give our son 6 months to find his own place and move out, so that we can make his room the nursery. He is more then capable of paying rent since his only bills are his gas, phone, and car insurance (all very small bills). Our son is VERY upset about this, says that we are choosing the twins over him, and that it isn't fair that he should be "punished" and "kicked out" for our "accident" (of getting pregnant). My wife has been very emotional about this and believes that we are being unfair. I think that he is old enough to be an adult and start living independently on his own. We can't have our adult children living with us forever!!

Question: Please tell me if I was being rude?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 06:54 AM PDT

I joined a bridge club and at my first meeting they introduced me to the other members. One of the members asked me what I did and I told her. She them asked me where I worked and I said the XYZ company. She said I know a lot of people at the XYZ company. Do you know John Doe? I said "Yes I do. He is my boss. Then she asked me all sorts of questions about John. Like was he a good boss? I told her he was a great boss. She wanted to know if he hit on the female employees and I told her no but I wish he would because he was a great looking guy. I was getting tired of her questions and I wanted to talk to other club members so I ask her why she was so interested in John Doe? She finally reluctantly told me he was her ex husband and then asked me more questions about him. I told her I did not care to discuss my work or her ex husband. That really got her mad at me and she told the other club members that I had been rude to her. It was obvious that she and her ex husband had unresolved problems. I was not about to get in the middle of her problems. Was I being rude to her?

Question: My brother died about 2 months ago?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 06:33 AM PDT

My brother recently died and it feels weird I have not cried and just feels like his away on work or something....we never had the best relationship we always got into arguments yet I respected him he always did the right thing my only regret was not telling him I was gay since he was I think that would of made us bond a bit

Question: I am darwin and where is my mom, you have a mom she has a mom where is my mom and dad!? Brothers, cousins, friends, houses, and property@!?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 06:25 AM PDT

Question: Is this too much to ask? (Sorry it's kinda long..)?

Posted: 16 Jul 2016 06:14 AM PDT

I'm 15 and my sister is like 32, but she lives out of state. She calls my mom every single day usually to just talk about random things but my sister and I don't really get along. Anyway my mom always tells my sister everything and I don't usually care but when it's private stuff about me, I care. I have a "problem" that I need to get surgery for soon, and it's really embarrassing. I asked my mom not to tell anyone and guess what, she goes right to tell my sister. Then some girl I'm not friends with anymore sent me a bunch of really bad texts telling me I should get raped, beaten, etc. and we had to go to the principal to deal with it, and she called my sister like 5 times to tell her about it and give her updates on it. I'm a private person and don't want people knowing stuff like this, so I got mad when my mom told her this. Another thing that recently happened was a guy sent me pics (you can probably guess what they were) and a bunch of other inappropriate stuff. She told my sister that too, without even asking me first. Whenever my mom tells her this stuff, my sister calls me right after and asks a bunch of questions about it, and it gets really annoying. I've asked my mom to please stop telling her things like this when they're about me, and she gets MAD at me. I've asked her really nicely and wasn't mean at all, but she still gets mad. I even talked to my school counselor about it and she still thinks the counselor is wrong. Sorry it was so long. Please no rude answers @Nikki, not trying to be rude, but I think she DOES need to check with me first before going and telling her my private stuff. She's even admitted that she just needs to get it out. It's not like she doesn't have friends either.