(I'm a guy btw) My friend said to wear casual jeans and a nice shirt. Polo? Dress shirt? Should I wear a tie?

My husband and our child's future Godmother attempted at throwing a surprise baby shower, which is scheduled for this weekend. I've known about all along. I reserved the space and sent out the invitations, which was supposed to be my whole involvement. My husband can't plan an event for crap, much less figure out the food. He always insists on having food for everyone that's invited (in this case, 90 people). I was involuntarily put in charge of the catering. The appetizers and cake are for 75 (as we have 52 invited guests that have confirmed), I ordered a catering package for 50 plus extra that would feed another 15-20, and we have sweets for about 80-90. Now my husband says the catering package I ordered won't be enough food for everyone. Apparently, there's uninvited guests that RSVP'ed in PLACE of an invited guest (WHAT???). I told him the only people we are obligated to have food for are the INVITED guests that CONFIRMED. I'm exhausted and cranky, and can't wait for this event to be over. There may be a few confirmed guests that I overlooked, but it's not more than 55-60 people. Am I wrong?

His mother is recently ill. We started talking how hospitals will get the patient out as soon as possible. I realize he is stressed about his mother's heart condition. Last year I needed medical attention to correct my breathing problem that had gotten worse. It was outpatient and they do not keep you in a hospital. I went to the hotel to recover and then see the doctor the next day. All of a sudden my fiance remembered my surgery and going to the hotel afterwards. He said I should have been in a hospital for an overnight stay and not in a hotel. Then he ranted on that I should not have anything else done to myself and that I am fine the way I am (I had mentioned plastic surgery for my neck, which is really sagging due to a lot of weight loss). He said this last surgery I self-mutilated myself with this surgery--which did not make "any sense at all." I had the surgery to make me breath better. The results were very good. His face was turning red, he was yelling, talking irrationally and physically pointing his finger at me. I had never seen him get this upset. I got scared and backed out of the room. I said that he needed to be alone for a while. What bothers me is that he is basically telling me what to do with my body and if I have a surgery, which doesn't meet his approval (I suppose plastic surgery), he won't support me and be there for me. So he is going to pick and chose. Normally there is someone with you for a surgery. I wish it wasn't that way. I may have to reach out to a friend or relative then, but I don't want to for medical privacy concerns. I am still shaking a little because I was not expecting him to turn on me like that. I have heard people will get angry at the ones closest to them if they feel they are losing a loved one. I think it's called anticipatory grief. I'm trying to make sense of it all. Wow linkus86, what alternative universe do you live in. You are assuming everything in your post. We made my breathing surgery decision together. And we will make any future surgeries together and hear each opinions out. But his reaction was not normal, but I think it's due to the stress of his mother being ill.