For years, I had my eye on one dream college. I was obsessed with the school. I worked so hard for my grades, and have always been a 4.0 student. When I got my acceptance letter, I was thrilled.Then, I got my financial package. They gave me no support or aid. The school was way too expensive for me and my family to take on. I was devastated. So I settled on a cheaper state school. I do like my school, but I still wish everyday I could've gone to my dream school. Fast forward two years, my sister got accepted to my dream school. Around the same time, my mother fell ill. She still is. Because of this, the school gave a HUGE financial aid package to my sister. She is now going to attend there in the fall. I want to be happy for her. And I am. But I am so devastated. I dreamt of going there since I was a little girl. Seeing my sister, who never worked for her grades, and always slacked off, going to my dream school, makes me feel angry. I feel like she is benefiting off of my sick mother and put no work in. I want to feel happy for her, but it brought tears to my eyes knowing she would be living my dream, one that I worked SO hard for, for so many years. Am I a bad person? How do I get over this jealousy? The thought of seeing her there makes me so upset. I know i need to suck it up and support her, but I don't know how to get over this feeling. I am still devastated. Seeing her commit there broke my heart. I love my sister and we are very close. How do I get over this feeling? 

Maybe I'm crazy.  I'm an American man with no wife and I'm not very handsome anymore.  I already have 3 kids and love my two daughters and kinda love my son (just kidding, I love him too, kinda) and I dream of marrying a muslim woman from Malaysia and having 15 kids with our own family yoga.  (Dragon Yoga).  But I know it will never happen.  What do I do?

She also says her sister's husband, my other aunt's husband, is guilty of emotional masturbation by trying to please his wife and do whatever she says to avoid conflict. I have no idea where she gets these sick terms but she goes to Al-Anon (our grandfather was an alcoholic). I used to see this aunt a lot but now it is the one and only thing she talks about. Then she goes into generational sins and the devil manifesting through the generations. So are these extreme accusations since physical incest has not taken place? Should I tell her I am uncomfortable talking about it? I generally don't try to see her unless in a group because her accusations about the other aunt make me feel so weird. My parents say I am wise to avoid both aunts unless it is a family event. Apparently Covert-Incest means a parent relies on their child for emotional support normally given by a spouse. I don't see my grandmother doing that at all though she does favor the other aunt. I can see the other aunt doing covert-incest with her daughter who she worships while turning on another child (a son). It is a case of narcissistic parenting. Both women, the two aunts, have a lot of hatred eating their souls away. So is this an extreme accusation and term or is covert-incest okay to say in cases like this? Again not referring to rape or physical incest by covert-incest (relying on your child for emotional support normally given by a spouse).

I'm the youngest child, and all my siblings are adults (i'm a teen.) Each of my parents have told me in private that I'm their favorite, and they told me not to tell any of my siblings.

This would be a crowd of about 20

So my fiancé and I been together going on 6 years. I have a son from a previous relationship and so do he. When his son was about 10 years old, he requested from his son's mother that he come and live with us for he needed male guidance and we had a family atmosphere in our home. His mother declined. He didn't want to make things complicated so we just went along with him coparenting with his son's mother and everything seemed to be going ok.  Now his son is 14 and he's out of control. His mother let him pretty much do whatever it is he wants. He's been smoking marijuana and stealing money from her. Now she's constantly calling and yelling at my fiancé telling him to come and get him. I am not opposed but I want to make sure that rules are established and boundaries are made so that his son understands that what was ok with his mom isn't going to go down like that here. I am just afraid my fiancé isn't going to set them boundaries. I've told him countless times he need to go either talk to him or discipline him, and he havent. He take his son's word that his mother is just blaming him for stuff. I feel like if his son comes here and steal anything or do anything outside of what I feel is appropriate, it's going to put a strain on our relationship, and they both will be kicked out. How exactly do I present this to my fiancé where as tho I don't sound like a bitchy judgemental stepmom and instead as a concerned mother?

One example. I bought a huge expensive slab of corned beef we froze. Our oven broke so she took it to her moms. Anyway they ate more than half of it and brought it cold, without flavor and cooked wrong. A roast should have the corn beads and be juicy, also the outside by crisp.  She got mad saying im.done with your complaints. My fiance just has this "I dont give a sh*t" attitude. We are very poor and other times she gets food orders wrong or grocery lists.  My car broke down so I feel helpless to her mercy.  She eats more than I do also. I almost have a hatred for fat people. 

I asked her a couple of days ago if she could take me to my hair appointment and she said yes.I asked her about it today to see if see was still taking me because it's tomorrow morning and she said she didn't know because her boyfriend is taking my brother fishing and she doesn't know what time they're leaving.If she isn't going with them how does that affect her taking me to my appointment when she told me she was going to take me ? Why does her world revolve around this guy ? Why does he matter more ? She told me she would take me now she's telling me this....It bothers me that she can't even put her own kid first she always picks this guy over me and my siblings....

We got satellite Internet it works good except sometimes when it shuts off for no reason. It goes out when it rains but now when it clouds up it shuts off too. We live out in the country only 15 minutes from town but none of the dumbasses want to come out here and give us new Internet because they think we're too far out. The closets is intellewave but my girlfriends aunt doesn't want it she thinks it's too expensive. We got Exdede or Expede or whatever it is. They had it for 3 years now. What could he wrong with it ? How can we get it fixed ?

I have been with my boyfriend almost 2 years now. He has 2 kids and I have 2 kids. The mother of his girls has always acted up but not as much. She cheated on my boyfriend with the man she is currently with now about 3 or 4 years now. Since I came into the picture the mother of his girls has done nothing but make things hard. A concern that my boyfriend has now, which idk what to say is his youngest daughter that just turned 3 is being forced to call her spouse daddy and she calls her biological father by his name. The oldest has said multiple times that "she doesn't know why her mom would force her sister to call the man daddy" the oldest her self has even corrected the youngest multiple times in teaching her who her father is and call him daddy. A couple of days ago the little girl asked her biological father if it was okay if she could call him papi or daddy. He told her of course, but that broke his heart completely, please what can be done? He has told the mother what is going on but the mother gets angry and saids she learned it on her own. This is heart breaking ! Please understand I do NOT and would NOT get involved especially with something so delicate. The best interest here is how to help these 2 girls and their mental health and the father. I just give my boyfriend advice like a family therapy for all 4 of them, talk things through with the mom come to an understanding and try to never argue and talk infront of the kids. 

He told me that he couldn't wait until I married a man who would leave me in a state where I couldn't leave the house.  He was basically wishing abuse upon his then 13- year old daughter.  My mom said if she had known she would have divorced him. 

I'm 14. I'm very mature. Dad's sister is using drugs again, she has a bad boyfriend who is in jail and she is angry at dad and grandpa, and I'm not even allowed to try to help. Because somehow I "can't" help, so it's not even worth trying. But I feel I can't just sit and not even try, it just feels wrong. I don't understand how someone can be so sad and lonely that they will do such a thing, and I' not even allowed to show that I care about her!

My father is a chronic liar and a bad man.

Let me know about your experience - pros and cons

She hated me first.

My son has been acting strange ever since I caught him masturbating, but I'm too embarrassed to ask any of my friends for help and if they've experienced something similar. He is 14 years old and he watches Phineas and Ferb. I never thought too much about it because I'm not that kind of mom who really cares if their kid is still watching cartoons or not. Anyways, the other night I walked into his room without knocking first and I caught him jerking off to it! I still have pictures of him from when he was a little younger with Perry! I don't know what to do. Am I enabling him by letting him watch that show? I hear about furries from my other daughter, and I'm really worried he will get wrapped up in it. He's always been a little strange and clings to anyone who accepts him. Please give me advice...

She has threatened to and we wear our virgin rings so I cannot have sex until my mother removes it when I marry one day.

It makes me really uncomfortable...could I talk to this with someone...like my teacher...will he laugh at me?will he find it gross?

Hello,  my mother will very often verbally abuse me and say things like "your boyfriend just sees you because he cant get who he really wants" and complains constantly about her life, and how i dont sympathize with her enough. she says "you have a mean gene, inherited it from your father (very bad divorce) you dont deserve to know someone as good as me, you will get abused and maybe even killed in your current relationship because of your attitude. maybe you will end up in the hospital and they will laugh at you"  whenever i tell her to stop complaining, she says "yeah i know you dont care, no one cares about me, what i went through." she constantly talks about the same thing, and sometimes i cant take it so i tell her to stop. she has been unemployed for a very long time now, and my father is not around so there is no family support. when i was younger she used to drive me up to where my father live and threaten to drop me off there. it happened very often. she will do the "silent treatment" a lot, but she cooks my dinner and acts like nothing happened so its very confusing. it puts a strain on the relationship i have with my boyfriend, because he thinks that i should move in with him to get away from her. i'm scared, im scared that the things she says will come true and im not financially independent so i would have nowhere to go.  so i feel scared. do you think she is abusive? or am i just thinking about it too much?

I remember years ago that I put a question up on this website, in hopes that people would help me but instead they ridiculed me and made me seem ungrateful. My previous question I had talked about how much I hated my mother and why she was such an evil person. I was probably about 14-15 at the time, so the typical response I have gotten were adults who assumed I was a bratty teenager who was just going through hormones and that "I didn't really mean it" and that I should "be grateful to even have her" Well, to those people who responded that to me, I just wanted to say (5 years later) **** you. Genuinely. I understand that a lot of kids say they hate their parents when in reality, they just hate how their parents won't allow them do to something or won't buy them something. However, I remember my question being detailed about how my mother acts, and instead of any help on how to cope, y'all were the same people to ignore my struggling and shamed it to be some teenager dilemma. So let this be a lesson to you, if a kid comes on here and gives valid reasons on why they hate their parent, instead of making them sound ungrateful- actually listen to the kid. Maybe I just needed an outlet to vent about the shitty things my mother has done. Regardless, 5 years later, I still hate her. In fact, I hate her even more today because of some more personal information I've learned. She is selfish, greedy, and lazy. I'm not ungrateful. I'm just ashamed that she had to be my guardian.

I live in South Carolina. My mother lives in New York. Back in May my mother was INSISTENT she come visit me in early June for a month here in South Carolina. I live in Charleston and everything has been a free for all since Memorial Day weekend. My mother arrived, went out to eat, went here and there and everywhere under the sun. My mother and I got into such a HUGE fight during her visit things took a turn and got physical for the first time in my life. I shoved her and I feel absolutely terrible about it but she would not listen to me and was completely careless on her visit here and put me at risk.  She woke up on Tuesday not feeling well. She decided to get tested and low and behold she is positive for coronavirus. She just found out this morning. She doesn't feel good  (Shocker) NOW she's screaming at me that she should have never come here, South Carolina opened too fast, she's crying because she is supposed to fly home Sunday and can't and the airlines won't give her money back. THEN she had the nerve to say "you should have stopped me from going out."  I'm absolutely FURIOUS. I can't even look at her face I'm so mad. Now I have to get tested today and quarantine for 14 days. If I'm negative I'm leaving her here and going to a hotel. My mom said I'm wrong to do this. Am I honestly wrong?!)? I'm sooo beyond angry!! 

For background, almost three years ago she had a baby at 20 years old. Her relationship with the father was an awful, mentally abusive relationship. In the last 3 years my family has been through a lot with her, trying to get her to leave him and support Ivan on her own, but with our help. She finally did leave him at the beginning of this year and moved in with my mom and dad with the baby until she found a house. She found a house in late March, so she's been out since then, but none of it has been easy. She finally seemed in the right track. However, shortly after she moved out she started seeing someone she was previously in a relationship with, even worse than the father of her child. She told me this morning that she is pregnant. We were all worried this would happen. My mom and dad will not handle this well and I'm not sure that there is anything I can do to make the situation better, but I'd like to try. I feel like this would be the last string for my parents, they may cut her off. It's an awful situation and I want to help, but don't know how I can. Help? 

My brother was always badly mistreated. And now I think because of this he is lashing out at frogs and toads and HORRIBLY torturing them to death. When he was little our dad literally used to tie him down and flog him with belts and stinging nettles for something as little as pooing his pants. He never did this to me though, although he once offered to do something to me that led to half my foot removed by a spinning wheel. Our grandfather loves yelling at him, he once picked him up and violently threw him on the ground for just playing with his cousin. The other time he threw a pillow during a pillow fight that knocked his cousin down. Our grandfather started screaming at him violently and threatening him, but our auntie- the mom of our cousin, actually saved him. He's had 4 terribly bad breakups as well. And I feel bad because once I found out that he burned a screaming toad to death and beat him up for it.  What can I do to help him? 

He is only this way with adults and I am becoming an adult. When I was little he was good.

So I'm a 21 year old guy and Ever since I'm a kid my mother has tried to control me. She never used to let me go out with my friends in my teenage years, she never wanted me to grow up or get a job. She was very abusive, manipulative and controlling to my father too. But when he divorced my mom, she dumped all of her hatred for men on my head. She also seems to be jealous of the fact that me and my dad are close but not my mom because of her behavior all these years. the real reason why she hates men is because when she was young her father abandoned her, but that still doesn't give her a free pass to make me her literal punching bag (yes she has punched me in the face within the last year)  I'm pretty sure she has some kind of anxiety or narcissistic personality disorder because she takes a ton of different meds that don't work. And I'm sick of her controlling, manipulative and narcissistic behavior. Should I sever all ties with her? Because I cannot stomach one more minute listening to her bullshit 

He's a great person. Super smart and really romantic but my parents have never met him and I'm worried how they'll feel. He's five years younger than me.  I don't think we'll ever get married though. 

Hi I'm Angelo I'm forty-five and own a very successful consulting company in Chicago running it from Vietnam. I have been dating a girl who is 25 her parents absolutely love me in the beginning. A few weeks ago I accepted an offer to move into their family home. For 3 weeks I watched her mother have several body possions where she becomes grandma and spews all her disappoinyment to her daughters and husband. She shows constant disappointment in her. My fiancee hangs her head low, not saying a word, as her mom rants downward for 20 minutes at a time or until her daughters cry. They also wanted to see a ring on their daughter's finger. I proposed. Whenever we are out of the house we are constantly interrupted by her mother through repeated phone calls where are you? what are you doing? excetera. This would be appropriate for her fifteen-year-old sister. I would like to add that we have been providing everything they need. I am happy to care for all of them. We told them we need to get our own place to focus on business because a building being constructed next door gives us 3 hours of sleep per night. You should know that she lost her twin daughter at childbirth and has a big problem letting go. I proposed renting a place just close enough for her mother to walk but away from the construction. Her parents agreed last night but called us this morning to say if we get an apartment they will sell the house total BS! My fiancee believes it and is being forced to move back w parents

I'm 16. I babysit my niece(7) for my sister.(39) She gets drunk every night. This night I hear her in the other room accusing me of stealing and saying I gotta go. She then asks my niece if I'm mean or if I hit her. My niece says no. She keeps asking and asking until my niece eventually says yes. (Which isn't true) She tells me at 2 a.m I have to pack my things and leave. I begin packing my things. About 10 minutes later, my sister comes in and sees me crying. She says she's sorry and I don't have to leave. I just stare at her because I currently am so upset right now. She gets upset all over again, and says "Oh you're a Libra, you like to hold onto stuff." Then lashes out and yells, "After all the stuff you libras have done to me!" I continue just staring. I tell her I'm going to bed. She says okay. Then leaves the room and continues talking about me under her breath in the bathroom (Like I can't hear). She comes back in the room and says, "You really didn't do that?" I shake my head no. She tells me she has to believe her daughter no matter what. I pack my things & leave. A few days later my brother says she's been drinking silly, and has been leaving my niece at home alone. He says she needs a babysitter and that I need to ignore the things she says when shes drunk & that she doesn't really mean it. It's just how she is & I need to accept it. I already have a new babysitting job that i start next week. (Saving for college) She really hurt me & never even apologized sober. 

My  parents were really abusive to me growing up. They've never apologized and they're still toxic.After my almost husband found out everything that they did to me he doesn't even want to see them much, let alone want them at our wedding. I did kind of want my siblings and extended family members there, but I know if I invite them, they'll tell my parents about it, and my parents will  expect an invite. If I tell them, I don't want my parents coming, they'll give me sh*t about it, possibly not come, and tell my parents I'm not inviting them. So, I'll have all this stress beforehand.  My husband to be said he would be willing to tell my parents he's the one who doesn't want them there, but I don't want him shouldering all the blame. Since I know my siblings would give me a hard time and tell my parents about it, do you think I should not invite any family, just have friends there and let them all find out afterwards? I'm not entirely close to my siblings but close enough to where I would want them to see me get married if I didn't think it'd cause problems. However, being near my parents steals all my joy. Thoughts. 

My parents found out I'm a stripper. My dad is especially pissed, but isn't he a hypocrite because he goes to strip clubs.  If he finds being a stripper so degrading and appalling and why is he going to see them and paying money to them? My mom also used to go to male strip clubs 

This trauma being their alcoholism and my childhood being ruined. I am 26 now and have had no contact with them in 7 years. My father apparently died 2 years ago but I made no contact with my mother and there was no funeral. I would not have gone had there been one. The verbal and sexual abuse was too much for me and no one believed me when I reported it. The sexual abuser is dead now (my father) but my mother I will not forgive for allowing it and she verbally abused every minute of the day. They both would say "you should see what our parents did" and I never met their parents and glad I didn't. I have never met their families either other then 1 cousin of my mother's and her husband who also sexually abused me and is now dead. The cousin was a heroin addict and would stay with us on and off. 

My sister is a toxic family member and we have never been close.

My father growing up was a verbally abusive individual who was a bully an alcoholic and a drug addict. I was able to gain some confidence of my own and earn a bit of success. Now that I have that success he wants a relationship with me so bad and I am not interested. It doesn't hurt me I believe in my self so much it doesn't hurt me. Is that bad?

My mother had me young and raised me on her own. Without even child support from mph father she managed to work hard,bought a house for us when she was 30, always was there for me and always found a way to get me what I needed . I'm telling yout this to understand in many ways my mother is AMAZING .However ..she also is overweight and now has diabetes but 'sneaks 'food like pizza and coke ,she has been on and off hard drugs the last few years and I just found out shes doing crack and meth (which she dabbled in on and off years past but no one knew) ...and lies a lot and she sneaks around w all this . so on one hand she keeps a good job ,pays her bills..helps me WHENEVER I need it like a normal adult..but then in these ways she acts like a teenager

My father growing up said he would help me out during college. The only help I got was transportation which I was grateful, I paid everything else my own tuition, even pitched in for maintenance costs. However, now that I am a bit older and independent he feels very owed and resentful over the car insurance he had to pay for. He demands special attention from me at family parties. Forces me to not hang out with the people my age and I must hang out with him. Forces me to disclose stuff about my job that I am not allowed to disclose. Why the pressure to always be with me at all times? He is also always trying to figure out what to freeload off me?

I want to go over to them and tell them to be and loving, bc neither of them knows if that's the last time they will see each other.(i don't,of course, but it upsets me that they've got the gift of being able to hang out,and they're ruining it)

i was standing at my mother's doorway waiting for her to finish what she was doing. but then her and my brother got "creeped out" because i was standing there, then mother told me to go eat but i did not want to eat and then my brother said "that's why everyone thinks im weird and no one likes me." i did nothing wrong and im confused about their behavior, what shall i do?

My boyfriend comes from a broken family; 4 siblings, father left when he was three, mother is an alcoholic with no job. He never had a "childhood", he cooked his own meals since he was able to, cleaned what needed to be cleaned, had pretty much zero guidance from his mother. Presents at christmas time only came from his grandparents. My family, on the other hand, is your typical family. I have two siblings, my parents have been happily married for 26 years, dinner at 5 o'clock with everyone sitting around the table, both parents hold steady jobs, etc. Now, onto the problem. My boyfriend hates my family. They never did anything to him, they adore him as one of their own. But he takes their love as insult. When my father asks him how his day was, or what he did the past week or what he's up to in his work, my boyfriend takes this as prying - his mother never took an interest in his life, so he is not used to these questions. He takes the questions as if my father is questioning my boyfriend's ability to succeed. In the first few years of dating, my boyfriend made an awesome effort to see my family as much as he could. Me and my family are really close, so he was seeing them a few times a month. He complained a little every so often, but I never realised how bad it really was. Last November, we got into a big fight and broke up for a few weeks. Thats when he really told me how he felt; how uncomfortable he is around them, how much he dislikes going to see them.  So when we got back together, we came to a compromise - for him to only see my family on special occasions (My birthday, Christmas, thanksgiving, etc.). Welllll that didn't happen, and I just assumed he needed more time. So I left it at that, never brought it up and just waited for him to come around. Recently, he kept mentioning "see how happy we are? Its because I took your family out of the picture". I ignored the comments, hoping that eventually he would want to see them. Today, we got into a fight. He told me that he will never see them again. How the hell are we supposed to get married and have children if he never plans to see my family again? Marriage is (was?) in the plan - how does he plan to marry me, without ever seeing my family? Once we're married, they're officially his family too. What about kids? They're going to want their dad with them when they visit the grandparents. Has anyone had a similar situation? Any words of advise?