My husband's coworker is getting married. This is someone my H has mentored, so we are kinda obligated to go. I love weddings and been to many over the years, but there are so many things about it that are turning off about this that I am contemplating sending a very generous gift and our regrets instead. 1- The are renting a house on a lake in a remote area. The nearest hotel/Airbnb is 40 minutes away so it is not like we can party and stay overnight nearby. We live 80 min away so we would have to drive there and then go home the same day. 2- They sent invitations 9 months away and want rsvps 5 months in advance (why??) but we can't commit due to the nature of DH job, he travels with a very short notice and on demand. I don't want to offend by not sending the rsvp, but we can't commit this far out. I don't want to send it and then having to cancel and upset the couple or making them lose money on catering etc. We want to support the couple and they are dear to our hearts, but the inconvenience to all guests and the expectation of commitment this far in advance makes me wonder if perhaps it is not a good idea. I'm not sure how many people they invited or how many actually will show up, but they are using the house as their venue, the couple, family members and WP will stay in the house. Thank you.