Hi. I need help.  I've been having emotional breakdowns. My ex bf of 8 years tried to break up with me last year January  Bc I gained 10lbs.... I promised him I'd lose the 10lbs and then in June he broke up with me Bc I told him to stop bleaching his skin.  I got depressed and was so sick. And then few months(December 2018)  I found out he was a dad. Pretty much the whole time he was cheating on me with this girl from his church ..and got her pregnant. I got on social media today and saw them getting married from a story someone posted. He was telling her how much he loved her and will love her till the end. I started crying Bc I wanted all these things with Him and he went and got it with someone else in less than a year. He treated me so badly the whole time he was cheating on me with this girl when all he had to do was tell me he messed up. And now I'm having emotional breakdowns Bc I feel like I lost big time. How can he move on so fast, baby and wife? Like why is life So unfair ? I stood by his side when he had nothing. The moment he became an IT guy, he dropped me and had a happy life with someone. How do I move on from this? I'm tired of crying. 

I m in an abusive marriage. I hate physical and verbal violence and think a lot about leaving. Having been subjected to violence, I want to understand why people commit it in the first place? I ve heard it is due to power/control and also what the person witnessed growing up. I really want to understand if all couples can get so angry that they will strike out or if I m in a minority relationship? I honestly don t know what else to do other than seeking out divorce and support. I have tried to calmly explain to my wife that she is lucky that I am not the average guy or else they would have hit back and left a long time ago. When she says she wants me out of her life, I do remind her that the next person she gets angry with will also be a punching bag and she may not be so lucky if they turn out to be a violent person themselves. Also that everything we worked so hard for will be divided, our son will be split between two homes and she will fall flat on her face.

I don't feel any attraction to her. Recently she's complaining that we're not intimate anymore. I tell her I'm just tired and a bit stressed out. That's not the issue. Do you think I should tell her the truth? I don't want to hurt her unnecessarily, but she will figure it out sooner or later. I'm in a very bad spot.

My husband's mother has always been cold and callous. There are dozens of instances where she has tried to push me away, control, stress me out to the point of tears. I recognize the traits as my maternal grandmother was the same way, and my mom and I have cut ties.  I'm posting this question because even today, after 4 years of knowing this woman, my husband is still going in emotional circles with his mom.  We are going out of town for the holidays, and we asked his mother if she could do us a favor and watch our dog for 2 days or we will put him in a kennel.  We got married in September and even then for our honeymoon, his mom and dad OFFERED to watch our dog. A month before our wedding, his mom had another emotional fit and backed out the last minute, leaving us to eat some unexpected heavy costs and scrambling to get him his shots to be put in a kennel.  Today, my husband decides asking his mom again, even though I would just prefer to stay away from her.  His mom freaked out again, accusing my husband of not devoting enough time to her and answering all of her every other day phone calls. It is very hard for me to not be irritated now with my husband for constantly setting himself up for disappointment. And I have told him, I don't even give a damn if he wants to continue whatever sad piece of relationship he's hoping to get out of this with his mom, I just don't want to be a part of it. When will my husband stop hoping for her to change and understand who she is?

how old was you when it happened?

We've been married for 7 years, but together for 9. These past few years have been the worst few years of my life. We barely speak to each other, all she does is lay around watching tv and eating. I can't get her to do anything. We rarely have sex, her and her family basically live for medicine. Their entire lives revolve around how and when they're gonna get medicine. It's sickening. She's gained weight, all she does is sleep and lay around, she's jealous too. My facebook profile picture was "public" instead of "friends only" so she woke me up early this morning to tell me I need to change it. On top of that, I'm so bored with life in general, I just want to take off and start over. I'm 30 and I feel like I've wasted almost 10 years of my life now with this person and it's steady getting worse. There's no talking to her. I've tried. She says things will change but she never does anything to change anything. She's so boring. I can't believe how boring she is. She may as well be a piece of furniture that eats all the food. She's there, but she's not, you know. Idk, I just feel like I should divorce her and stop wasting my life with someone who doesn't care about themselves enough to put effort into their own life. I can't take watching her sit around in this couch for another 7 years. I'd rather just die now and save myself the misery of being with this person. 

Why do they always leave?

When my husbands (& his sisters) grandmother died several years -15years ago -we all agreed on who could have what. Husbands sister had absolutely had no interest in grandmothers Christmas decorations (she actually put them on the curb for the trash to take and I wanted them so I got them) yesterday my husband told me that his sister wants to go thru the decorations and that I need to let her take whatever she wants. I told him no. I've been decorating our tree with those decorations for 15 years!! I know his sister. The ornaments are vintage and she wants to sell them. They actually have sentimental memories to me and I'm not giving them to her. Now my husband and his sister are mad at me. Shouldn't he be standing up for me and tell his sister no?

We've been married 4 years. He travels for work once a year. I looked on his computer and found out he has hookup apps on there. He uses them once a year. He'll hook up with a woman while he says traveling. I haven't said anything. Should I confront him? For some reason the thought of him doing this turns me on. It's the sneakiness that turns me on for some reason. Should I tell him I know or not?

I have asked my husband to be responsible for the maintenance of our cars. Several months ago I bought a used 2009 Nissan Murano. About 2 months ago the tire pressure light came on and it worried me. My husband said that those little batteries only last about 10 years and he said they are not worth replacing unless I just want to light to go out. He said that as long as my tires are properly inflated there's no need to spend some $500 just to replace the sensors and get a dashboard light turned off. Well, this morning after I left for work I decided to stop at a repair shop close to my job and they are telling me that I have the wrong sized tires on my car and that they are starting to dry rot and would replace them for almost $1000. They said that's why the light was on. When I told my husband I did this he hit the roof. He said that if he's going to be responsible for the maintenance then I need to listen to him. No, I didn't put new tires on the car but I did take it to another shop to get a second opinion and they didn't say anything about the tires being the wrong size or dry rotting. They did turn off the light and my husband said that's an unnecessary fix because the light will come back on if they didn't replace the sensors. So right now he's furious with me because he said I never listen to him and from now on he wants me to take my car to a shop instead of asking him. What do I do? Did I piss him off intentionally?

Your husband has a friend with small children, and he or his wife is always asking you to babysit them while they work. They just come by whenever and try to drop them off. You only casually know these people, like their kids okay, but don't want to be used as a babysitter. They promise to pay you for it but never do, and if you refuse they act like you are being mean not to want to watch their kids.

She's nice but whenever we meet. She will ask "Are you going to have a baby girl?" or "When are you going to have girl for B to play with" I replied to her "Not sure yet/ maybe not." She still asks this type of question often when we see her. It does make me feel something I don't know.

Are social media apps appropriate for  a 37 year old? How can i get him to be an open book with it, other than snooping thru it without him knowing. 

In all honesty, I want to keep him. He is well behaved. My wife wants to get rid of him, but I don't want to. Will we get a divorce if we disagree? But I am probably going to keep it.

A 30 years old man marrying a 24 years old woman.

He continued to be a husband until  a month ago he went overseas and when he returned never came back home. I recently about his infidelity. But when I tried to submit my separation papers and order of support for me and my daughter I was a Bard that I have been divorced since 2010 which he has been living  as husband and wife up until the beginning of this year 

Every day is a complaint. She complain about our son eating pizza but guess who hasn't cooked in about 14 years? Our daughter does all of the cooking since she's in culinary school and that's her passion. Wife always acts irritated when daughter is in the kitchen cooking.she talks about our daughter makes a mess but our daughter always cleans up after herself so I feel like she's mad at something else.  So I was like " you complain about our son eating pizza. Why don't you cook him something he will eat." I work 12 hour days I'm too tired to cook. If she's so mad with our daughter cooking and our son eating fast food then she knows what to do. My wife said in regard to our daughter " I hope she's not cooking tonight. I hate all this crap on the counter." I was like " what Is your problem. The girl got to eat so she's cooking a meal." My wife will have me to go buy her Burger King and Popeyes and tell me make sure it's not cold. I was like " why don't you ever drive to get your own food to ensure it's not cold You have a car." Wife claims she doesn't like to leave the house on her off day. She wakes up at 12 pm on her off day and then watches tv all day and night. She works retail. Wife complains about not having any money and is mad that our daughter boyfriend buys her gifts a lot. I was like " he doesn't have a mortgage. That's how he can afford all the gifts. Just be grateful you have this big house and a nice car. I can't afford to buy gifts.