So a long term friend that I've had asked me to be her maid of honor. We were closer when we were kids, and I initially agreed and told her that I could. But she did not inform me of her expectations beforehand, and I didn't think to ask her about what was involved. She expected all of the bridesmaids and I to pay for our dresses. She also sent a long, entitled-sounding text message, where it was clear she was expecting me to arrange a bachelorette party, and partake in more of the wedding planning than I had expected. Mind you, the bride is in a different financial situation than the bridesmaids and I. She is settled in a financially secure job. The bridesmaids and I are college students, some working and some not---clearly not in the situation where we have extra money to shell-out. I felt as if the cost demands and expectations were unfair, especially considering that she was raised in a struggling low middle-class family who was always on a budget. I thought it was disappointing and a bit ironic that she wouldn't be as understanding of our financial standing. When my sisters got married, my parents covered the cost of just about everything. Has anyone else stepped down as maid of honor or best man before? Is it odd to step down for financial reasons? I personally felt disrespected and as if I was being taken advantage of in the situation. The bride is the type of person who would ask copious favors of others in the past, and do very little for others in return.

On one hand I want to be a good friend and attend the wedding and be supportive. But on an emotional aspect, I don't know if i'll be ever to hold it together. When he first told me the news he was engaged I broke down in tears and couldn't stop crying for days. He told me through text he was engaged so he did NOT see me crying thankfully. I told him congrulations while I was falling apart on the inside. I have known him for 11 years and he is by far the best I've ever met. The entire 11 years I've known him he's always been a stand up person. I think we've only ever had one arguement the entire time we've been friends because we mesh so well together. We have a lot in common so we don't really have anything to argue about. We both are on the same level financially, spiritually, emotionally, and physically. He's always been the one person that I can relate to above anyone else. When I''m around him I feel a sense of comfort, I peace, I feel true joy. I've never been as happy as I am when I've been with him. He's everything I want in a boyfriend and I don't even have to try to mold him into what I want him to be. He already has it all. I realized that I've overlooked him all these years for toxic men. I realized that I'm in love with him. I was going to call him and tell him about how I felt or write him a letter and tell my feelings but before I got the chance he told me he was engaged. I've always been in a relationship and since he has morals he has never tried to make a move. this is the first time i've been single in years and years. But my relationships with those other men were toxic, draining, and full of compelete misery.

Her wedding is still 6 months to a year away so invitations are not out yet and likely won't be until after Christmas. This is my aunt's daughter so my first cousin. She is 31.