My fiancé and I would love to get married. We don't have much money and are in our mid to late twenties. We are still developing ourselves as professionals in our fields. We thought about getting eloped and without a big party. Maybe we will have a big gathering later, but nothing right now. We come from different social classes and different educational backgrounds. My parents wouldn't want me marrying a man that has less education than me. His parents wouldn't want him marrying a woman that isn't from his ethnic group. So, we just planned on telling them we are going to get married. We don't think there's a right thing to do since both sides are in protest. What to do?

My fiancé and I (25 and 26 years old) went to get our marriage license and was told to have a wedding officiated within 30 days. My parents and his parents do not know we are doing this. We both come from working-class families but from different places- I'm Black American and my fiancé is African. I'm currently getting my PhD and my fiancé is still getting his BA. My parents wouldn't accept him because he is African and because he isn't as educated as me. I fear that, but I do love him. I know his family would prefer that he have an African woman from his tribe. So, we've accepted these differences but we would like our parents to know. What to do? We would like to get married. We planned on having a civil (courthouse wedding) since his family is in Africa and my parents wouldn't accept this. However, I would want a larger wedding if the circumstances were different.

It was my first time, I was basically extremely emotional and he was sweet and emotional too, he looked me in the eyes in a strange way, like wide eyed, and covered me with kisses, and asked me if he hurt me, if I was sure, if I wanted him to stop. As we were doing it, he would keep on kissing me.. at the end he basically passed out on my chest, and laid his head on me. I asked him joking if he had passed out he raised his head and laughed and said no, and he kissed me where the heart his and laid his head again on me and looked like he wanted to sleep.. on me. So why did it happen? Is it so tiring for guys? Why did he take me as a bed (I mean, I'm joking but seriously, I'm inexperienced and don't know lots of things. Why did he behave like this?). He looked so different from the other times, he was always self confident and aloof, this time he was worried about me and looked emotional.

So the other day I came back from work cold and shivering because I had been waiting for the train and it was so damn cold. As I got home he was there (he had been waiting for me to come home, I live with my parents). In my room I told him I eas so cold and tbat it would have been awesome if he could hug me. He said of course and we hugged under the covers watching tv. It was so beautiful I felt so safe and warm in his arms. At some point I turned to look at his eyes and he said smiling: what's wrong? I said: nothing you have the mkst gorgeous blue eyes ever. And he said I was a liar and I did because I wanted smth from him. I said no, and then he replied ok and I was a bit mad at him for not believing me so I wanted to go away from his embrace..he didnt let me and we fought a bit until he kissed me and said he loved me and I said that too, and kissed him on the cheek. I don't know how it eacalated so much but we ended up kissing like we were out of breath and I felt my heart like going into tachycardia and he started to put his hand (he didn't grope me, just put his hand) on my chest feeling me under my pj and bra and at that point I looked at him in a really sad way, dont know why. He said 'dont be afraid of me, I love you' and while saying this he had this innocent face like he really meant it, and looked me straight in this eyes with a sort of sadness, compassion. What was that? When he kissed me again he had this worried and captivated face