This is a repost as I didn't get a response from the other question. Should I leave him alone or should I persevere? What do you think?

So I've heard about you moving away from the abuser and not being able to contact anyone so what all takes place when you're in the program ???

I have been with my husband for 8 years (married for 4). His communication skills have been horrible since day one. If I bring up any kind of relationship issue what so ever(without nagging), he freezes up and says absolutely nothing at all. Literally nothing! He completely ignores me. It takes him no less than 2 or 3 days to talk to me about the issue and when he does it is very short and concise. I learned to accept the 2 or 3 waiting period but I never should have. I hate to be ignored. Now that we have 3 children together (a 4 year old and 2 year old twins), my husband's lack of communication is really pissing me off. I have tried everything to get him to talk to me but he won't. His communication is so bad that his own mother told him that she didn't think he would ever get married because of it. And looking back, as much as I love him, I should have never married him until he learned how to communicate and address issues. This might sound cliche but "Communication is Key." What should I do?

My husband filed for divorce a week ago out of the blue. I have a few questions. He does not want to involve lawyers and is being civil. He printed out a petition (had to file electronically) But has yet to hand me and physical papers to sign. Will this count against me if I don t sign because he hasn t given any to me or would it be thrown out? I read something about default divorce if I do not file a response. If I don t file a response does he have to go back and file for a default divorce or is it something that automatically happens? Also, (sorry, I know it s a lot) if I don t file a response and he doesn t file for default divorce, what happens? I m still trying to save my marriage and want to give this as much time as possible!

Your significant other shares children with her ex. Instead of the ex stopping by and picking the kids up on the weekend, or them meeting in a mutual place, the ex comes over to her place while you are at work to see the kids and hangs out there. They also have dinner together at her place sometimes while you are not there.Would you be ok with this?

If the marriage doesn't work out for any reason, or you married a deceitful witch by accident, she has you by the balls. Even without children, your ex wife is taking half of your posessions AND alimony on your paychecks. Throw in kids and child support and your life is dead for the next decade. A prenup can only save what you have before marriage. I mentioned atheist since them and their partner shouldn't care about spiritual significance and have no scruples against cohabitation and premarital sex; a christian or jewish man can be devastated just as hard though. I have no idea why gay men wanted marriage so badly, it is financial suicide for men.

So your with your husband and the hot mom from church leans over in her super cute flowy top and you can see her Victoria s Secret bra tiny bra. Happened. She leans over to talk to young son meanwhile we are standing. I could see everything so I know my hubby could. What s the correct/appropriate/polite way to get out of this situation or make it go by faster at least

a married was verbally and emotionally abusive towards his wife and they got divorced. He then married another woman. Is it possible that he might treat the second wife well and never be abusive? Or would he eventually show his true colors and be abusive towards her too? Are people who abusive capable of change? Do they pick and choose their victims? What if he doesn't see the second wife as a "victim"?

He responded back to her telling her that he would love to go but that night he's going out of town on business. He says that she never text him back... I found this out by looking through his phone and then I confronted him. He didn't tell me himself Also I seen a previous text where they were supposed to meet up for coffee but she wasn't able to make it and another conversation where he asked he if she would like to join him for "a bite to eat" after work. My husband says there just friends and they haven't seen each other outside of work ever because there schedules never meshed. Am I wrong to be upset? Please please give me advice!

I've decided to have a family with my wife but she's taking too long to warm up to the idea. She was very resistant last night when I told her my decision. She knows what her role is so why is she doing this? I want to ask for prayers for my wife to retake her domestic role. I know she will have my kids but I don't want her to resist every time we try.

My husband has known his bf for over 30 yrs. They were both in each others first weddings and his BF was the best man at our marriage 2 years ago. They were the first people i met when i moved w/husband to his hometown...we lived right across street.ss Street from them in my husband s hometown.. Bfs gf was always nice but when we moved across town didn t try to keep in touch. My husband bf started working with me and my father-in-law when my husband was on a job out of town for 2mnths. We do handyman services etc and needed an extra hand.. He worked with us until my husband returned.. Fast forward about six months down the road and my husband goes out of town again to work and his BF comes to work with us against. I noticed she started giving me an attitude and then one day I just text her and ask her why she was being that way and she told me because she knew last time that we work together that we slept together. This was almost comical to me as I had no idea where it came from. I tried to assure her that nothing happened to no avail. She has since posted negative things about me to Facebook without saying my name has text me nasty things and has tried to cause problems in my marriage. My husband s BF left her for a month because of the craziness and now she is back. I have never received an apology and she is still very distant. This is a small town we live in and she has smeared my name. Truthfully I just want to punch her in the face.

my bf and I are 30 years old. I been married before he hasn't. we have issues with his family. we have some past issues and we do argue here and there but who doesn't, his family they dislike me and think he can do much better and never include me in anything ... we always talk about marriage and getting engaged and I asked him the other day out of the blue and said if I was to say hey lets go to the courthouse tomorrow and get married would you marry me? cause I'd marry you today tomorrow next week next year idc cause I know I want to and will. his answer was "will I marry you tomorrow? no.... we have a lot to work on and we need to fix our arguments" and just kept going making excuses. it hurt my feelings and maybe he has a point but if you love someone wouldn't you just atleast say yes I would def marry you tomorrow. I wasn't being literal but he said flat out no... I've have dealt w so much from his family and other things I've done for him and I get a no... how can I take that?

Should you allow her too, even if you are still angry?

I'm 17 male. I want to have 4 wives. One for morning one for noon one for evening and one for night . I can do "it" 4 times a day :)!! Is there anywhere it is legal in the USA?

Me and my husband have been married for almost 5 years and we have talked about having children years before we even got married and we were both on the same page on having children. But now my husband has researched clinics to find the best place to get a vasectomy and I don't even know how to react. I believe in god and I know you are supposed to stay married. but if he were to go through with this I don't know what I should do

He works from home, and she stays with us on weekends and summers. When she is over, she tends to lay in bed ALL day long Facebooking or taking selfies. Today I went home for my lunch break, and asked my husband if he ate yet. I told him I was planning on making something. He said "no", and then said his daughter (who was still laying around in her bed) hasn't eaten all day either. Meaning make her lunch too. I have no problem fixing food for her, I do however have a huge issue with her lying in bed doing absolutely nothing all day ever day. I work all day long, cook, clean & grocery shop. In my mind she is old enough to get up and fix her own food, and get her butt out of bed (there's a serious issue if all a human being desires is to lay around all day). On my way out the door, I told my husband "your daughter laying around in bed all day is going to get old really fast. She can get up and make her own food." He pretty much dismissed me. I know part of the issue is because when he does ask her to do things (even come out of her room) she throws a fit. Rolling her eyes or ignoring when her dad speaks. She just overall acts like a royal "B" if she's not getting her way. The other part is his lack of actually being a parent to her, as he doesn't do much with her in any form or fashion. I'm more than a little frustrated, and would like advice on how to handle the issue.

I got divorced 2 years ago and i still have crying spells. I also started dated someone new for about a year. He dissappeared and i found my ex getting married on Facebook through mutal friend posts yesterday. I havent ate in a week. I feel as if im homesick but im at home. Anyone else ever feel like that?

So, here's my story. I come home from work and all I get is verbal abuse from my wife. She compares me with her friends "husband' saying that they are so much better, they care about their wives, ( i'm thinking in my head, of-course they are happy because their wives don't abuse them verbally day in, day out). My wife can't cook whereas her friends can. Then says, she hates my family and calling my sister "mental" just because she have a mental health problem. I told her that you cannot insult a person because they have a mental illness. I have been dealing with this for 3 years thinking, one day she will change but it's going in circles. I told her that "it's best we file for a Divorce and she goes ballistic...she says "is it because I am ugly and your seeing someone else". I can't spend my life like this, being so good to her for so long and all I get is abuse.

To my understanding, a marriage or divorce is valid in any country under the Hague Convention, so perhaps the second marriage was not valid as I was already married to her? In any case, I first married my ex as a mexican, and in Las Vegas as an american. How can I submit the mexican divorce papers to a US court, if I'm not in the States anymore?. Update 1: In the mexican divorce, everything has been settled (child support, community property and visitation).

My friends would like to move to the US. Back in February she came to visit me for a week, and she really liked the US, especially the attention she received from guys. She is a single woman, no kids, never been married. Has difficulty maintaining or finding a man to starts a serious relationship. She has contacted me to tell me that she is having trouble finding a job and would love to come to the US with a tourist visa for a couple of months, meanwhile, she wants do nanny work and to try to find the love of her life, here in the States. My close friends had advice me not to host her in my house. They feel I could be Jeopardizing my marriage and my privacy, besides, I don t have a spare room for her. Are my friends overeating, or I m just to naive and can t see the danger coming?

He responded back to her telling her that he would love to go but that night he's going out of town on business. He says that she never text him back after that but he could be lying. She's only 24, my husband is 45. He has no business going out to a bar with a single women and also having her phone number!? I am enraged but am I wrong? What are your thoughts? I found this out by looking through his phone and then I confronted him. He didn't tell me himself Also I seen a previous text where they were supposed to meet up for coffee but she wasn't able to make it

Long story short, my husband got a DUI before we were married. We hired a lawyer, paid this guy $7500. Busted our butts for over a year to pay them so they would handle this case. Went into credit card debt...all my cards are now in collections because of this. Finally paid the lawyer off in December, we went to court this past April. Lawyer said we had 2 choices, pay $1000 by the end of June, or, my husband would face probation/dui class/etc. The problem is, yes, my husband is an alcoholic, but since we have been married I have been helping him manage it better, and keeping him from driving while drinking! But, a stipulation of the probation will be no alcohol and this is just going to cause him more criminal problems! HIs parents are no help. We have no extra money to be able to have this paid off within the next 2 weeks. We would have saved it up if we could but there has been no money to save. I know my mother could lend it to us, but I did not want to have to ask her for help on this as it is my husband's problem (mine since we are married) but nothing to do with her. But....I see no other solution. What should I do? Ask her....or let my husband face probation and possibly revocation? ADD: He DID drive to the store under the influence. BUT, the officer did not pull him over. He ended up knocking on my husband's front door after my husband was home. Lawyer practically promised he could get the charges dismissed, so we didn't save up any money for a possible fine. His charge if we pay the $1000 (which was be a bond relinquish) would be like a texting while driving charge. Otherwise, it's going to be reckless driving, I believe. ADD: I'm not saying my husband shouldn't pay for his crime, BUT, we paid this lawyer $7500 to help us and he really hasn't done anything except drawn this out. And probation revocation when he can't stop drinking alcohol. Not license revocation, that has already been taken care of. Please learn to read, sheloves_dablues My husband will be facing consequences and he has faced consequences, as have I, due to his irresponsible stupid self. We have spend the past year and a half dealing with this. It has ruled our marriage...taken all of our extra income to pay the lawyer. We have had weeks we didn't have any money for food. So, please, stop judging and just answer my question. Should I ask my mother to help with this last $1000, he will still have a charge, OR, not bother my mother with it and allow us to.. ..both suffer while he deals with probation and many more fees and fines, and the possibility of having that probation revoked and him facing jail time. I get this is his problem, but unfortunately, his problem affects my life, too. His parents say they don't have any money to help. I totally agree it should be them, if any parent. But, I just don't know what else to do. I just want it all to be over with. @Bea, he would be receiving a lesser charge, Texting While Driving, and not a DUI, if we can pay the $1000. Otherwise, it will be Reckless Driving with a year probation. He won't lose his license, that's not a worry, it's the ONE thing the lawyer did do. But, if he is on probation and fails a piss test, which will happen, he'll go to jail then lose his job and where will that leave us? Me? I'll be honest, I bit off way more than I could chew agreeing to marry him while this mess was still going on....I know our marriage will not survive him being on probation. So, I guess that's why I'm even considering asking my mom for help. @Hurricain, and you know, she probably won't. It's a 50/50 shot with her. I feel like I'm lowering myself by even considering asking her, honestly. I just don't know what to do. :( He's been drinking for 20 years. It's not as if he can just quit. I guess some of you don't understand alcoholism. Do not get me wrong, I do want him to quit and get help. But, that decision is not mine to make.

My children are 19 & 32 months old. We both work F/T, but yet he feels that it's entirely my responsibility to tend to the children if we're at a party or at the park. Yesterday for example, it was his birthday party, which he threw for himself. He didn't do anything special for Mother's Day, nor did I get any free time to myself whatsoever. I was taking care of the children again while he was too busy getting drunk and socializing. These last few months, he has been more concerned whether he has beer in the fridge than on the children. He said he wanted to have a family, but after yesterday, I'm not so sure anymore. I'm exhausted, stressed, and burnt out. I know he knows, but he won't even take the children for a couple of hours while I run out to the salon. And our babysitter says she's not available. And now he has hired a pre-teen to babysit on Saturday when I'm home without even consulting me about. We both know this girl from church, but I don't believe she's mature enough to handle two toddlers. He is turning out to be just like my ex was, which is why we're no longer together. I know if I do decide to leave, my children would never see their father again. He would pack up and move back to his country. I believe he may fight to stay in their lives, I'm just not as sure as to how far he would go or how hard he would try. He has his own ideals as to how a marriage should be, which is that the woman takes care of everything. For the Anonymous responder: "" I was taking care of the children again while he was too busy getting drunk and socializing. " - it was his birthday party, so his behavior on THAT day, makes sense." The word 'AGAIN' is the key word in this statement, meaning that this is what he does on EVERY special occasion or at EVERY party/get together, INCLUDING the Mother's Day BBQ. And no, I didn't know he was this way before I married. We discussed it before getting married, and we both wanted children. He changed after our son was born (who is 19 MONTHS). @ Missy: who is WE? It's a PERSONAL choice whether you want to continue counting a child's age in months vs. years. I, for one, do both. It's a nice way to remember milestones and to see just how much a child has grown. Why does everyone seem to be stuck on that: A) I should've known, or B) I married before knowing him well enough? First of all, he's very traditional in the sense that you shouldn't live together before getting married. Fine! My dad taught the same way, but I didn't listen because I knew that nowadays you can't really know a person until you've lived with them. And second of all, he CHANGED--AFTER--the birth of our son. Amazing, no one has really ANSWERED the question. Only judged me!

I don't see how marriage is beneficial if there's no intention of having children. I understand wanting to provide a stable living environment for a child, but what if a couple doesn't want to have children? What's the point of getting married then? You could just live together. Why the need to involve the government in your love life? I don't get it. You can have just as much companionship if you live together.

My hubby has been having an affair for 2 years..then i cought him and he left her.the girl remarried and my hubby is heartbroken.everyday he cries to me and says how much he loved her...it is killing me..i hold on to hom and say this shall pass but its horrible..he says he loves her but is with me for the kids only...it is killing me...what shall i do?

I went to my parents' house over the weekend to see my terminally ill mother who has lung cancer. While I was there with the kids, my husband was home trying to "sort out my life" (his words) and do the chores while I was gone. On my way home, I tried talking to him without much give back. and we had an argument because of his extreme insistence about taking a detour because of some construction. It was the way he come across that bothered me. After I got home, he decided to mow the lawn. Wanting to ease tensions and put the argument behind us, when he came in to take a break to get a glass of water, I tried showing him a snapchate picture on my camera phone. Apparently still angry, he tried to dodge looking at it. OK, fine, but today at work when I tried showing him a snapchat during our 15 minute break together at work, trying to get him to stop being so angry and humorless, he called me "a 34 year old child". Then, even though I'm upset at how he's treating me, he took that exact moment to try to talk to me about family problems! His timing could not be worse - we could look at a silly squirrel picture in 15 minutes, but definitely not possible to have any kind of meaningful discussion about family problems during such a short time, AT WORK! I'm losing my mind. Why is he so rigid and so easily bent out of shape? Why can't he ever relax and let anything go, even when I'm struggling with my mother's cancer? I thought marriage was about love and respect; not being argued with and criticized all the time, including times like this when I am so emotionally vulnerable?

He just doesn't agree with the concept of marriage but is otherwise his loving and very faithful to you and your future children

I recently turned 26, my husband recently turned 30. Usually we make love 2-4 times per week, but the past week I want it every day and again right after we finish! I have always enjoyed intimacy but its all consuming. I sit at work at think about my husband and fanticise about what we are going to do after work! Ugh is there some hormone peak for women in their mid 20 s? We dont have kids.

My husband is bipolar and he doesn't typically fight fair (working on in therapy). During an argument this weekend over taking my car as opposed to his truck to go to the store to get lighter fluid for the grill (note: in retrospect, this shouldn't have been an issue and I don't really know why I preferred he take his truck, lesson learned--pick your battles), he became so irrationally and disproportionately angry that he grabbed my bra cup edge with his hand over my shirt and tried to--I don't know--rip off my bra to expose my breast to the underside of my shirt rendering me somewhat less comfortable?? I am trying to understand why he or anyone would do this? I would not have become naked, so what is the deal? We were alone, so it wasn't particularly humiliating. I would have laughed if his nail hadn't pinched me. We have a therapist that I would normally refer this to, but our appointment is a week from now and I don't want to bother him by calling about it because it really doesn't bother me that much like I need emergency advice. So satisfy my curiosity with your two cents....what the heck was going on there? Thanks for the insight, be it humorous, contemplative, or even somewhat rude! Ultimately, I can put the brakes on the whole "is he trying to establish his feelings that women should be subordinate?" and just get back to the triggers and the good times!

I don't have a life outside of my marriage. I gave it up so I could be with her (pretty much was her indirect demand that I isolated myself from the rest of the world to be with her). My wife also gave up her life but not for me, for the kids. So the way it works is this: I live to make my wife happy, my wife lives to make the kids happy, the kids are just living and they don't care to make anyone happy but themselves. And any effort I take to try to fix this dynamic - like me having a life outside the marriage or like me helping her make the kids happy - results in her biting my head off (figuratively - though when she's angry I wouldn't put it past her literally) and telling me that it is my job to make her happy because she's too stressed "trying to do it all". Mind you, my wife does NO house chores at this point. I cook dinners, I make lunches, I do all the grocery shopping, I do all the chores, I do the lawn, I do the trash, I do it all, just so she can go to college and she can "play mommy"... My kids are in double digit ages, so they don't need their mommy any more, but she still wants to make them her life; she thinks this makes her a good mom because her mom was a bad mom and had a life outside of the family and my wife felt neglected as a child (her words). This makes me wonder, what is the norm? I'm caught up in this chaotic mess, so I don't know - what is normal? Is this bucket filling where she fills the kids and I fill her then leave myself empty normal? I think she treats me this way because her mother supported her father (my wife's role model) while he was going through college and allowed her father to be absolved from everything. So I think she thinks it is normal to not contribute to the family while you're working and in school. Honestly, these last 2 months have been all about her. The world revolves around her "or else". Something I noticed today -- No Mercy is swbarnes2. Also, they both are LOSERS.

Were both married. Neither wanted to leave our marriage and that was accepted on both sides. We enjoyed a very close friendship as well as sex when possible. Neither of our spouses know anything. Last week he ended it because he felt guilty. He was adamant that he did not want to lose my friendship. I respect him enough to honor his feelings but it is killing me. I haven t spoken to him for 5 days. I haven t initiated any contact at all. He has sent me some emails but they are articles he thinks I would enjoy. Nothing personal. I loved him but he did not love me except as a friend, he said. I believed he felt more but I have to accept what he said. I miss him being in my life so much! I feel so sad. I want to believe he misses me too and maybe regrets ending our affair.

My wife went to her parents' house over the weekend to see her terminally ill mother who has stage 3b lung cancer. While she was there with the kids, I was home trying to sort out my life and do the chores she was absolving herself from helping with. On her way home she talks to me the whole car ride and made a detour home a HUGE deal despite me knowing a great way for her to come home despite construction. She actually got home faster than she would have going the normal way, but she still flipped out and was vulnerable. I gave her some space and decided to mow the lawn. I came in to take a brief break to get a glass of water and she stops me and tries to force me to look at her camera on her camera phone. I see the snapchat logo at the top and I try to dodge a picture. Today she showed me snapchat during our 15 minute break together at work and she was super elated about how silly it was... I'm under the impression that my wife is a 34 year old child at this point... I know this is rude and infantilizing her in an emotionally abusive way, but seriously... I tried to talk to her about family problems we are having and she can't contribute to the discussion. But that squirrel she notices climbing the tree is awesome and we should stop talking and look at it, because she said so! I'm losing my mind. And here SHE's in college, not me? Something really wrong here... Why is she immature and irresponsible? I thought marriage was about love and respect; not babysitting adults? Since it appears that my question wasn't clear, there was construction and she had to TAKE a detour, not MAKE a detour like stop at a store for milk or something stupid like that. So rather than listen to Google Maps on what way to take, I took her a different way. She was just angry that there was construction. She's a road rager.

I've posted about this prior only now things are worse. My HB is a chronic workaholic. NO, we are not in financial trouble and he needs to be. Yes I work FT and we have 3 small children.These are his new hrs: Mon - Thurs. - 2pm - 10pm, 11pm - 7am Friday - 2pm - 10pm Saturday - 6am - 2pm Sunday - 6am - 2pm, 10pm - 7am He feels like he needs to pull his share of the weight when shifts cannot be covered, but I am sure that no one else is working this much.He feels he may be frowned upon if he does not pitch in and I get that but this is not healthy.My fear now is that he will work himself into bad health and not be around for our kids. He now seems sympathetic for my view, but changes NOTHING. On top of that, Where in his schedule is our time? When he is home, I feel guilty for even wanting to make love to my very own husband, since I know he is completely exhausted! I feel guilty when my kids want him to get up and do things! I really just don't know what to do. Any suggestions I make for adjusting our living or location or cutting back, he shoots them down. Says that wont work. I would NEVER care about a job to the point that my family NEVER sees me or my kids have to go a week without seeing me! He is physically drained, I am lonely as h*ll, and my kids need to see him other than Saturdays ( he does not come home at night since he goes to his second job and we are gone before he gets in in the morning). What do I do?

divorce? We leave friends or even close relatives behind verye asily. Why are people so scared of divorce?

My husband and I got married and had our first baby daughter this last month. Now my husband is saying that he wants his mother to move in with us. His father recently passed away and he doesnt want her to be alone. I love my mother-in-law, however, i want to be able to establish my own family with my husband and daughter...just the three of us. I am worried that she will dictate how we raise our daughter, offer her opinion in everything we do and generally make my home uncomfortable to live in. My husband has two older siblings, however, both have slight disabilities...i am not sure if that is why living with them would not be an option... I love my husband and do not want to leave him...i also would not want to force my daughter to live in a broken home... I do not know what to do. If i werent married with a kid I would bolt! This is a total deal breaker for me. I take my vows seriously, though,and am now stuck. My husband has said "ther is no question whether she is coming...i just hope you will forgive me." What should i do?

we've been separated for a yeAr now he don't even bother to see or help w kids ..he texted saying we need a divorce ..and says pretty much I'm garbage next thing is he misses me n kids later at 2 in the morning he says I wish things were different ...??? Idk what to think.. I'm Confused

I can't make assumptions about my wife; I enjoy doing it (and you all know I do) but all my assumptions have had a low accuracy rate. It's not because I'm bad at it, it's because my wife is emotionally reactive and lives her life almost entirely through her emotions and her moods. Some would say that's "being a woman" or she's bipolar; honestly I don't care about the label, I just want to know what she'd be thinking when I stop caring about her and I start focusing on me. My wife is currently in this weird online school where she pays tuition once and take as many classes as she wants within this weird 6 month window. She started on April 3rd and she's already earned 16 credits. She also works full time with me at the same employer, and we have 2 kids who are in double digit ages. My role (at the moment) is to work full time AND be the home maker in the home to catch up on all the chores she has to neglect to RUSH and get her Bachelor's degree before she has to pay tuition again... So with this knowledge, she doesn't have a whole lot of time to co-parent or to have a healthy marriage. Me and the children have become her sacrifices... Meanwhile, I've started dieting and I've lost 1/2 a pant size already. I want to start daily walks or bike rides but I realize she can't go with me. I also reduced my FB friends list to 12 people because they overshare too much on there; so I want to join a group and be more social. I'm just scared of her overreaction. What can I expect? Correction 18 credits. I forgot one was worth 6 not 4. To clarify --- Stop caring does not mean stop loving my wife. But my wife is a very "independent" woman in the sense that she only needs you in her life when she tells you she needs you. If she didn't demand your attention then she wants to be alone. And when she demands my attention, she wants something without doing anything in return - like a backrub, or go to bed and abandon me to put the kids to bed. I'd be unavailable is my point. As far as her bachelor's - I'd still be supportive.

So my husband and I have been on a roller coaster for particularly the past year. Seemed to really increase after he started showing he had ED. But regardless less of that, I am fully supportive of him in everything. He is not with me, he tries to control how I mother my son, he threatens my son with physical harm because he had a horrible nightmare. Then verbally attacks me for comforting my son who is 9. He believes he is right now matter what and will not speak to me till I try to smooth things out. It s been 6 days, he wanted to move away from my family and I stay at home, homeschooling my two children. He tells me he hates our son. He verbally attacks me any time I stand up for him. Which is often. Just recently he grabbed my son by the back of the neck and lifted him up because his sister and him were fighting. My son immediately got an inflamed lymph node where my husbands thumb was. I think I need to leave, but he tells me I am just too emotional and sensitive. I am extremely lonely and have beautiful vibrant kids who need a happy home. Am I being emotional or is he being abusive? These examples are just in the past week. If I had a journal it would be endless events like these.

My mother in law pretends to "want a relationship" with me, but we have fought for years and have been in competition (she habitually copies things I do). I am married to her oldest son, and mentioned that my mom wanted me to talk to a lawyer before I married him to protect assets. She said "well if you and Jimmy get divorced, Jimmy isnt entitled to what you had before you married him." I explained to her that I had no plans on divorcing her son, and she said "oh, ok. well if you did divorce, know that you dont have to worry". Does she want us to divorce?

To may a long story short I will give all the key points necessary to understand this situation... -I am four months pregnant and have a 2 year old son with my husband. -I caught him "talking" to a "friend of the past" and kicked him out of the house. -He admitted to a mutual friend he was deeply in love with her and was going to be selfish and follow his heart -Later he admitted to me in a phone conversation that they were just friends and he has love FOR her but never cheated. -He blames me for all of this and says he just wants to end it -He says he has never been a cheater in any of his past relationships. -As I was packing his things in our home, I found a scrap book from his previous girlfriend before me. Yes he kept her scrapbook... -The girl wrote in the scrapbook that he cheated on her with someone else and that he started talking to me before ending it with her. I never knew this... -He is now doing the same thing with this new girl by talking to her and ending our relationship to be with her. I want to reach out to the previous girlfriend to confirm the cheating and the timeline to understand if this is truly a pattern of behavior and find out what really happened between them so that I may have closure on the whole matter. I know he is a liar and that at the very least he had an emotional affair during our relationship, but I just want extra closure that he is not willing to give me himself... Should I send her an anonymous email asking questions?

For those who think when I change screen name's I'm being sneaky - this is the newest UV incarnate. This week I want to see if there's ANYTHING I can change about myself to improve my marriage. So here's a scenario that happened this morning: I have a terrible memory. It's not because of any mental disability though, it's because when I'm learning something I'm terribly distracted and I only 1/2 learn it. Today I was trying to have a civil conversation with my wife to explain how her power of suggestion (planting seeds) manipulates me and basically shames me into doing as I'm told in a covert/passive way (I don't like to disappoint her). But during my explanation to show her how this shames me (she tells me it isn't intended to shame - or so she says) I brought up something she hopefully could relate to about her past to show her how this manipulation works and my wife said that I remembered her past wrong and that I need to STFU... Wow... I needed to STFU because I remembered something she told me wrong... Of course this triggered an apology out of me, but I already "pissed her off" and the conversation had to end or else... The rest of the ride in together was wasted on drama... Mind you, she only got 6 hours of sleep (which is more than normal). Her past or her present behavior/thoughts/stories are off limits to examples, but how do I show her something she can relate to if I can't involve her in the things I'm trying to explain?!?!

My mother and my wife had a big fight last week. IMHO it was both of their faults and while I did and always do stand by my wife she says in this case I did not fully supportive to her. I told her that she need not deal with my mother anymore but that did not satisfy her and told me that due to this situation and not being happy with me lately she wants a divorce. This was mike wow!!!!! Where did that come from as I thought we were reasonably happy. I'mm 55 and she is 51 with 2 kids in college. Now a week later it's like the whole thing never happened and she said she loves me. What do you make of this and should I let it go or get therapy for myself to learn to deal with her better.

Wife and I are not the type to talk about feelings. But this makes me feel like I'm being used to have kids. I understand her libido is low, but I still want some intimacy before we try again. Any advice?

we have been together 4 years now and have 2 children. we have had some problems with him cheating and flirting with another women. should i be worried?

The whole 3 years we been together no sex we been married for a year and 4 months no sex granted I was deployed for 9 months of that. But we not sleeping in the same bed or nothing I get no sexual attention and its pissing me off in more ways than one. Why the **** don't my wife wanna have sex with me damn? I ready to just walk and leave cause wats the point in cheating might as well find someone else.

I'd like to know the public's opinion about how important sex is. Married people, if you have sex regularly, or sparingly, do you think it will / does effect your marriage? If you're single and have sex or don't have sex before marriage, do you believe it will effect your marriage if you get married someday? I'm just interested to see what people say on this subject. Thanks much!

In the four years we've been together (2 married) I bet we've only had sex 30 times. In the past year its only been once back in july. In august I hired someone to follow her because I was thinking she had to be sleeping with someone. Well after several week and several thousand dollars nothing. She isn't messing around and I never really thought she was. I went to therapy by myself because she doesn't think its a problem. Nothing, everything I was told to try failed.  Well a couple weeks ago I said this is it. I spent $600 for a bed and breakfest. Set up a romantic dinner, candles in the room hot bubble bath and wine. Well about 1 am she said "well I'm tried, thanks honey this was romantic and nice, I love you" kissed me and went to sleep. REALLY? That's it?  When we got home we talked and she made it clear that our sex life was fine with her. She said she enjoyed it when we did it, but that it shouldn't be that important. She said that she has never been this emotionally attached to anyone. She said in past relationships there were based on sex and for the first time she felt someone wanted her and not just sex. So I said because I respect your wishes and treat you well you punish me with a lack of sex. She said that what she wants, and the emotional connect should be good enough. So I left, I moved out. I just didn't feel like she placed any weight on my needs to be with her physically. Its been four weeks and now she is saying that she understands how important my feelings and needs are. Now she claims she is willing to have more sex to please me. Now I'm thinking that she is only doing it to keep me. I don't want that, I want someone that wants to have sex with me, someone that is attracted to me. Secondly I'm not even sure I believe it. We have meet up about 5 times and every time she will say "let me prove it to you now". She still won't agree to see a therapist, saying they only ruin marriages. That makes me think she is hiding something. I guess my question is can she really change that fast, and would it last?

My husband has a Facebook account. He has 220 people on there. We married last year. I logged onto Facebook myself (not with his password) and looked at his account. He has about 40 of them as females! Is this normal? I took his iphone a few months ago (he saw me doing it)and changed the status from single to married. He didnt like it as he says it has been already a year since we got married and people will all congratulate him and think its now, he doesnt like that, but still let me change it. Now i am away from him, in Germany, and i looked just into his account and the facebook status married is not there anymore. I confronted him with it just now via email: Baby i really didnt touch it. If its gone i dont want to put it again for everybody to congratulate me again. Its very cheesy. Please send me your log in information and then i will change it back to married and upload a new profile picture for you too. As you said you didnt like yours anyway. But its more appropriate if it has one of us together anyway. Many couples do this on facebook. I will use the one I attach in this email it so you can look at it. Have a little confidence baby. That has nothing to do with confidence! It is just wrong! You are married now and you are portraying yourself on Facebook as single! All man change their status to married after they marry! So can you change it please to married. So people know you are married? Why is that a problem for you that shouldnt be a problem to show that you are married.?There is nothing cheesy about this. Why is that a problem for you. Everybody who is married has done it. Please give me your log in information and i check it out. Why you not like that woman can see that you are married? We already did it. every body coguraduta we been married more than a year.but when you come we can put our picture if you like So it shouldnt be a problem for you now. Please send me your log in information and i will change it very quickly to Married! You are portraying yourself to everybody on there as a single! to any new woman you add too! I dont like this at all. Please show you stand up for it and send me your login information. You are making me realy mad now If you don't trust me do what ever you like and stop harassing me please.im waring my ring and I love you.if you don't believe that is fine. Since you don't waring your ring should I say you portraying your self.that is very stupid thing to say The only reason is because i had lost too much weight so i would have lost my ring. I need to have my ring changed. I believe that you wearing a ring but in a marriage many partners share their log in information. That should not be a problem. Margaret too said it should be no problem for you to have married status on Facebook. It is normal for me to ask that. I trust you but it is strange if that would be a problem for you to change it to married, like everyone does. Everybody and new people who look and search for you will think that you are single and its not good to give false information. And its also the right thing to do so people see that. I don't have a problem with it and you put it once I'm not hiding I'm proud of it. I don't like when you are to pushy.relax I'm telling you I did not take it out and we will put it again please stop about this kind of conversation .its remind me of my old relationship Trust trust trust I hate woman's stupid negative thinking.Im tired of it I am totally different then her! Dont twist this around. I am not stupid. Reality is that it is actually very normal for everyone to change it to married! It is also normal to give me the login information. Everybody agrees with me. You add many new people, woman i dont know about, i have never met. If there is no problem you should not hide anything to me. What is the big deal then to change it Right Now!? I thought you love me that much. Lets change it now. Should i be concerned about the way he acts and behaves??