We were childhood best friends up until about 10 years ago when i moved away. We stopped talking as well and it was because of some issues i had with her. We are both in our early 40's now, so we stopped talking when we were 31 or so just an fyi. She always had to have things her way and we had to do things that she wanted or else it just wasn't fun. She would use me to drive her to the bars so she could get drunk 3 nights a week (knowing i didn't drink much it was perfect for her). I had a major problem with her doing this since she had kids at home and her husband would watch them on drinking nights. I tried telling her about how i felt and she was just manipulative and turned it around to make me seem like i was the crazy friend that didn't see things right. Moving away from her was one of the best things i ever did. Now, don't get me wrong, we had great times too and i missed that very much, but i got over the manipulation and drinking and drugs. Anyhow, its been 10 years later. Her brother has been diagnosed with stage 4 cancer and she has asked that i come up for a week and stay with her and her family and do some partying (concerts and stuff). She wants me to stay with her at her families house when i come in. I haven't seen these people in 10 years and it seems strange now. I agreed to do it in part because of her brothers cancer and because he was like a brother to me. I honestly don't want to just fly in and pretend that 10 years away didnt happen Even though i agreed to come in and hang with her for a week, i think her and i should talk first before me just coming in to stay at her parents place (and they will be there too). I don't know....how would you handle this?

My struggle is communication. I have this group of friends, and everyone loves to talk and make over the top jokes, while I sit and watch, awkwardly. And when I do have something to say, I just make things awkward. So I say nothing at all and now I'm losing them. Can I have some advice on how to be "the man" in my group of friends?

@JoshuaBrennt

So I've really started to hate lunch. My friend doesn't have the same lunch period as me, so I can't sit with her. That leaves me with this girl who's really clingy and thinks I'm her friend. Being an introvert, it's really hard to listen to her talk nonstop to me for 20 minutes. Also, the cafeteria is too small and it's really crowded, which is really energy draining. Plus, it somehow got out that I'm a vegetarian, and so now I get made fun of for that almost every day. I feel like maybe it would be a good idea to just hide in a bathroom stall during lunch, I could bring a little snack in there, just go on my phone until lunch is over. I wouldn't get caught or get in trouble or anything, the teachers use separate faculty bathrooms. And I can't go in the library because my school doesn't have one. So I was just wondering if this is a good idea?

Hello! i'm sherly and as you can see i have a friendship problem. To start of, i was in class and suddenly my friend enters the classroom. I happily wave at her and say goodmorning, but all i get is a look. I thought it was not big deal at first because everyone is in a bad mood at monday. As we get further in the day, i tried talking her, i tried making her laugh, but anytime i talked to her all she did was try to ignore me i ask her questions like, how's it going? she answers me but always annoyed. Then i noticed her in a good mood i see her laughing with some of my friends making jokes and stuff like that, but every time I near and try to talk to her she answers with no interest and like i did something terrible horrifing. The most suprising thing that happend was at the end of the day. I was walking out of school (take note that the friend that's ingnoring me we walk home toquether) so as i make a turn i see her going the other way around, she took the longer way home to avoid me,(she hates the longer way home)we made this awkward stare, i just simply looked away . The reason i'm so confused was because in the weekend we were having a good time, i never said anything disrespectfully to her. i'm really confused for this because in lunch one of our friend whisperd in her ear saying " why you mad at her" and she said i'll tell you later .I texted her saying "hey what happend, we didn't talk much,are you mad at me". No response yet. what do i do?😰

An extremely annoying girl believes we are best friends, even though I secretly despise her. She constantly butts her way into all of my plans with my friends, and gets super mad when someone says they're not her 'best friend'. I am friends with her sister and don't want to ruin our friendship by telling this girl I don't want to be friends. How do I tell her this without causing her to get extremely mad at me and potentially ruin my friendship with her sister?

So here's the thing. This saturday it's my birthday. I was thinking about throwing a party but a small one,just close friends. I'm friends with this. My friend studies about 4 hrs from our hometown. However she comes often here, like once a week or once every 2 weeks. A few months ago there was a big concert and she came for this and basically to touch base with family and friends. 2 weeks ago she came home for the weekend. We do see each other when she comes home. However when I told her about the party she said "Idk if I'm gonna make it.sorry." It just hurt me. I mean,she comes home for a freaking concert,she comes here almost weekly and she cannot come here on a damn saturday night for my 21st birthday? I just texted her "ok" but I was mad inside,still am. Should I just forget this person and not speak to her anymore? Because I don't know if it is just me but this made me think she thinks I'm worthless. We have just one birthday a year,plus this is such a milestone and she just doesn't know if she can come?Would you guys get mad? Plus it's not like she has classes the next day DIck: c'mon dude. She can come here for every stupid thing and she she can't for my 21st bday?!

Every time I play a game my friend has to get mad and pout every time I loose. I had to get angry back at him told him it's a game I can keep playing it doesn't end. Right now I'm playing Subway Surfers my favorite game on my phone. He wants to win he wants me to collect everything but I can't and run at the same time. He kind of has anger problems especially when he's drunk but he hasn't drank for a while. What's wrong with him ? He's 26 years old

Today is another day where my timing seems to be off in relation to all my friends. I just got my wisdom teeth out and my mom is keeping me at home so I can't hang out with my friends who are having a birthday/drinking sleepover. Even though I know my friends aren't hanging out without me on purpose I can't help feeling jealous, depressed, and unwanted. Every time they hang out without me I feel like a less integral part in the friend group, and that they are growing closer without me. Some part of me realizes that i'm being overly emotional and another part of me recognizes a grain of truth in that they don't need me and are becoming closer to each other, and possibly more distant from me. Right now I keep crying thinking about it, how do I calm down and get over my feelings?

And you were not friends with the ex girlfriend /boyfriend prior to your close friend dating him or her

i got caught up between my friends getting into a scuffle in a parking lot Because my white friend called my other friend the "N" word. just as when the arguement got worse, my black friend started throwing his fists at him. They are around their mid 20's and it was only a 20 second fight. now this morning, my white friends mom called me up with such outrage and yelled "who was beating up my son!?!? That guy is a f**king n**ger for doing that, a f**king n**ger!! im calling the cops to your house to explain!!" which got me all scared acting like im the one in trouble, blaming me for the actions i didnt do like its all my fault. Though my white friend says alot of insulting words like calling me a jew. SMH will i get arrested or sent to court for something i didnt cause? he knows how to lie

I am from PK. In Feb, I made a friend on Facebook 'K'. K was a friend from Bangladesh and we got together because we were fans of Harry Potter. Then, she accused me of things I didn't do and then she blocked me. I blocked her in reply. Then, her best friend in real life called R, contacted me. She said that K was really sad and I should get back to her. And I unblocked her and went back to normal. Then, because I didn't recognize a celebrity from her country (K loves her country) and because I laughed at her name, she blocked me. Then, I started talking to R. She told me about K that K had forgot me and she didn't mention me to R. Then, R broke up with K and she told me about K's new best friend. Her name is N. R gave me N's Instagram and I made a plan with R. I told R that I will message her with a fake ID (I would later reveal my true self) and get them back together. What I really wanted to do was get back to Noah, that's why I messaged her. Then, I requested N to get me back to K (told her my true ID) Later, I talked to R that I'll betray N because she did wrong (R got thrown out of the group because of N). But that caused HUGE problems because R told N about this and N said she was going to get me arrested if I ever dared to step into her friend's life (N told her dad) N came to the rescue. She comforted me that nothing will happen as I was in a huge shock. Can I get arrested for this? FYI, N is 15, K and N are 17. All are girls except me. And all of this happened on FB.

Someone I was friends with had would always flake on me to hang out with other people. WHen I confronted her about it, she made it seem like I'm acting ridiculous. I would post stuff I'm doing with my other friends on IG and she'd ask for more details about what we're doing and the location. Sometimes she would be sarcastic with me when I asked simple questions about the show she was watching on Instagram. I asked if that was a game and she replied sure. Come to find out that "game" was a show called Game of Thrones and she was being sarcastic with me. She also likes to take days or almost a whole day to reply to my messages when everyone else answers me in a reasonable amount of time. So, since I stopped messaging her or hanging out with her, now she is reaching out to me 2-3 months later saying she misses seeing me around and talking. What's her problem? 10 points?

She is trying to quit and but it is not happening. The thing is 1.) I care about her and want her to stop 2.) She really does want to quit but then just changes in many ways when she needs it (some are not friendly either- which I don't like) and 3.) I am not going to be friends with someone who does this for multiple reasons. How can I help her while not being a jerk... there is a balance. Any suggestions?

I have been a happy, lucky-go person for a while. But, it started to change. I have been through trust damaging experiences. I have been through a few traumatic experiences. I can barely trust my family. I can trust one friend. Now my emotions have started to degrade. No one besides a friend understands this. The only spark in my life is that friend. Help..?

I feel like I lost a really great friend (I was friends with the whole family, and when things got tense, the dad said they care about me), but the girl blocked me on facebook and said I was barely tolerable. I stopped going to their church because it's too hard and stopped talking to the girl, even though I care about them as friends. We were friends for years and then this just happened out of the blue...so I'm wondering if I continue to give space if the girl will eventually want to talk about everything, as she really hasn't explained much else other than her brother telling me I'm "barely tolerable." This really sucks because I was friends with the whole family, not just her. to clarify, when the brother said I was barely tolerable, the girl who I felt was annoyed was acting distant, but she hasn't said anything to me. I had been friends with this family for about 4 years when this happened all of a sudden.

when you are in a community for example and they do whatever possible to stay away from you and they dont want you near them, should you chose to leave? or to stay and face them ? if we leave we are making them happy and we are trying our luck to find something else and who can guarantee us that it will not happen again and again and in the end we end up running away from everything. If we stay we are defending for our place in the community but we will suffer. So which one would you do?

My friend was molested as a child by a family member and ever since it went to court and everyone in the community knows what happened he's extra depressed. He keeps having good spells and getting a job etc I can see him coming out of the depression. But ever since I came back from a months holiday he's locked in his house won't go anywhere with anyone. He's taking drugs he is pushing all his friends and family away. How can I help? What can one do when a person is over 18.

So we are all adults, late twenties/early thirties. This has happened on a few occasions. They arrange for us all to have a cookout. We bring food, they supply some food. So on. Things are fine and dandy and then they start fighting. Like both yelling, crying, and refusing to do their part of the cooking. It got bad once before and we just left, which was apparently really offensive to them. This last time we just took over the cooking and told them to work it out, but then sat at a very quiet awkward dinner table. They are good people, but the situation makes us very uncomfortable.

This is an odd question but, isn't this where they belong? I am a touchy person, but, no one really knows it. I don't touch people because I respect them, but I want to. So how can I change and be touchy with people all the sudden? I wanna be able to be the touchy kind of person in a way but not be over the top

solipsistic-the view or theory that the self is all that can be known to exist, exteme egocentric ok, so I had this friend from a few years back and we really had a good friendship along with some other friends. She did help me a lot in the past. Now she is accusing me of being 'solipsistic' for not being in contact after being far apart from each other. I know it's my fault for not greeting her on her special days like bday and wedding, (I also had some self-issues around that time) but still... recently she messaged me to ask something and of course even if we hadn't talk for a while, I replied politely. Aftewards she got angry and posted a status saying it's funny how ' solipsistics' reply when she message them. Like what's her deal? (sorry english is not my native language)

OK, i am 12, i'm in 7th grade, i am cringy, immature, and all that. but i don't get why people HATE 12 and 13 year olds SO much? my older sister is always talking about how cringy 7th graders are. it makes me insanely upset. i mean i cry for HOURS. i hate being this age but i can't help it. i mean, i like to think i'm "mature" and i literally see other ppl my age and think they're super cringe lol. but literally some 12 year olds can be more mature than 15 year olds. like, my sisters friends make fun of me for EVERYTHING. "omg your sister is the one that always wears uggs right? cringeeeee 😂😂😂" "omg your sister like one direction? 😂😂😂" my sister and her bff had a 30 minute convo thru text about how i like 1d. LITERALLY. i try to act like i don't care what anyone thinks and laugh when my sister laughs at me. but it really bothers me. she was making fun of me and i literally started crying and she didn't care at all and kept laughing and calling me "cringe". i am constantly judging myself trying to be "less cringe" i hate it SO bad. i'm almost 13, so one more year untill i'm supposedly not cringy. i know i should "enjoy my childhood" and all that crap but literally, why do people hate 12 year olds?? like only that age?

I want to be friends with a group of people but I don't really know how and I'm a little scared to... They have all been friends for at least 2 years and they all seem so close. They are all really nice to me; they say hi, give me high fives, etc... but I'm not sure if they genuinely like me because when we are in the group, they mostly talk among themselves and I don't really know what to talk about with them... I feel like they are just nice but don't want to get to know me anymore. I'm very nice and open but I'm a little quiet until I truly get to know people... I think I messed up because when I did hang out with them in a very large group, I didn't know them well so I was very shy.. it's been about 5 months already.. How do I get to know them?

Hello! i'm sherly and as you can see i have a friendship problem. To start of, i was in class and suddenly my friend enters the classroom. I happily wave at her and say goodmorning, but all i get is a look. I thought it was not big deal at first because everyone is in a bad mood at monday. As we get further in the day, i tried talking her, i tried making her laugh, but anytime i talked to her all she did was try to ignore me i ask her questions like, how's it going? she answers me but always annoyed. Then i noticed her in a good mood i see her laughing with some of my friends making jokes and stuff like that, but every time I near and try to talk to her she answers with no interest and like i did something terrible horrifing. The most suprising thing that happend was at the end of the day. I was walking out of school (take note that the friend that's ingnoring me we walk home toquether) so as i make a turn i see her going the other way around, she took the longer way home to avoid me,(she hates the longer way home)we made this awkward stare, i just simply looked away . The reason i'm so confused was because in the weekend we were having a good time, i never said anything disrespectfully to her. i'm really confused for this because in lunch one of our friend whisperd in her ear saying " why you mad at her" and she said i'll tell you later .I texted her saying "hey what happend, we didn't talk much,are you mad at me". No response yet. what do i do?😰

so I talk to people on a chat thing called Discord and my mom says the people on there are 60 year old PERVERTS and doesn't bother to meet them first before claiming they're some messed up grown man, the people I talk to online are usually 11-14 year old boys and sometimes girls, she only believes they are children if she sees videos of their faces. how do I stop my mom from being so retarded about the people online? Edit: my mom has also called me an idiot for constantly having online friends who are really just kids. Edit 2: I have seen some faces of those online people and definitely not an old mans face

My friend is drunk and we have school tmw and he s not going to sleep and he wants to cause more **** and his Mom is in the next room and he s being an annoying kid he s not even falling asleep and he s keeping me awake doing dumb **** what do I do I m not trying to get him in trouble with his mom because then she ll hate me too

Friend A have Friend B some belongings to sell and split the money. Friend B was unable to sell belongings and told Friend A. Friend A told Friend B to keep whatever he wanted and then give whatever was left over back. Friend B is trying to sort through whilst having a job. Friend A now has blown up and threatens to call the cops and make a police report. Does Friend A have grounds to do so? Technically she said Friend B could have whatever he wanted so Friend B could technically have wanted them all and therefore not have any to give back. Friend A is honestly just being greatly impatient and not understanding of Friend B's schedule.

When I started high school I began to notice that my thoughts and maturity level were very different than my friends. They would ask me to hang out but the plans would be vague and usually involved some strangers house to party at. I also found myself not being able to carry on a conversation because their topics are silly and stupid. Usually about boy trouble, a party they went to, drugs or why I don't drink. I have tried to have a meaningful conversation about controversial topics or my troubles with life in general but it just gets awkward. I just feel very secluded around not only my friends but everyone in the high school. They have such silly conversations and do stupid things. I have much more interesting conversations with my parents, grandparents or older cousins. Does anyone else out there feel like they were born in the wrong time? If so how do you make it work?