affair because my husband is emotionally abusive and controlling. Yes I know it's wrong but I've did everything possible to make this marriage work. My husband is nice for 5 minutes then falls back into his old ways and bad habits so I truly don't think he loves me and probably won't give a F when I walk away from this marriage. He knows I'm in a toxic marriage and has been doing his best to make me feel better. My guy thinks he's cheating on me as well I can't divorce at the moment because I'm still trying to become fully independent. Me and this other guy have talked about a future together. He treats me 1000000x better . Trust me when I say this is not just a fling. He's been single and waiting on me to get out of the marriage so we can be public with our relationship. He's amaZing and easy to talk to plus I'm attracted to him and I feel like he's more my type. Anyways we have sex a couple times but next time we have sex he wants to go in raw and use plan b afterwards so I won't get preggo. I've never had to use plan b so is it 100% effective because I definitely do not want to get pregansnt. My guy doesn't want kids either. We have discussed this. The reason he wants to do it raw is because I told him I struggle with getting an orgasm and he wants to see if I can catch one without a condom. He said sex feels way better without a condom. Yes I've seen his paper work and yes he's clean. He knows I'm clean also I've only had sex with my husBand

And as human mind has memory, so she will always remember their size, shape, taste, smell and their behaviour during sex. And specially if she does'nt do any acts with her husband except once a year vanilla sex, saying she loves her husband very much and has changed now and does'nt like sex anymore, then how is the husband supposed to feel? Is he not supposed to feel like his wife is fooling him with her words after enjoying everything with her exes? Because the husband will never force the wife, so he has no other option except to live like a loser, whereas the exes will always be the winner who extracted everything from his wife already and made her boring now?

I tried to fix everything but it didn't work! My IbispaintX used to be good until this happened! Whether I press the paint button it suddenly frozen my screen! Please help if your a IbispaintX professional!!!

My brother met somebody and got married after not even 3 months. They're still together after 2 years. We all thought he was crazy. But they seem to be happy.

Ours are just gold plated stainless steel. Will people look down at us? Will they think we're not serious or that our marriage is not legit?

So long story short,I came back from active duty army and my wife of 2 years basically took out her IUD while I was away . I had told her a billion times that I was not ready for a child and even lost count of how many times I drove that home . When I came back , I asked her if she still has her IUD on she said yes and now you know the rest of the story . So basically she lied and I had told her that I wasn't ready yet . I was thinking to myself to wait till I at least get halfway into the PhD school of my choice so I don't lose any financially stability because kids are pretty much expensive. Now , I'm kinda stuck .  I'm not the guy to seek an abortion for a child neither is she but I felt very devastated because I just wasn't ready and was planning on kids sometime down the road.We had a big argument during this time and she finally basically confessed that she wanted a child and was going to have it on her own terms , not mine . She says that she's sorry that she lied and hopes I forgive her for it , which I did but it's kinda hard to forget. While I was also away , she bought fertility pills with our joint card and I saw the order on the statement, called her and cautioned her to refund it as I wasn't ready for a child. She never returned it and just brushed it to the side. I can go on and on , on a rant about this but I just wanted to keep it short and ask your opinions about this even though I already know what I will do for the sake of my family. What will you do?

I've been told a few times on this board that asking questions about marriage means mental health problems. How can this be? You've never once in your entire life ever questioned marriage?

I think at least it would help me make that mental leap I need to submit to the marriage rules about fidelity and until death (or divorce at great cost)

She hasn't had a job in a year and has the audacity to complain about the lack of romance and time I spend with her. I see her everyday but we don't need to talk 24/7. She wants to watch movies and talk 24/7. Unlike her I have a busy work schedule. We have been arguing 24/7 and I think it's probably because of the resentment I've built up with her refusing to drive her self places and work. Every since she got fired from her last job she's lost all motivation to work again and I'm stuck with all of the bills.  At first I was okay with her not working but then months became a year and things became a problem. Plus she never wants to have sex with me but she's had sex with the two men that she cheated on me with. I've read through her texts and apparently I'm abusive because I tell her right from wrong. I fuss at her because she has a spending problem I have to put her on a budget like a child because she will spend us out of our house. I found out that while I was working to pay all these bills she has been at the house texting a man all day telling him I'm abusive and they make plans to have sex in our home while I'm at work. I do get heated a lot and mabye I create arguments out of nothing but I believe it's the resentment of her not working not wanting to drive and not having sex with men. How is it easy to take off her clothes for another man but not with me. I'll be honest and say that she did tell me in the beginning of our marriage that I wasn't her type but  But she said that physical attraction isn't important as a solid and stable relationship 

Young man who is a minister and newly married all of a sudden started staring at an older woman. His wife is never in church. When she is she is playing with her hair. Anyway now he is being nice. He ask this woman about her children. He has been caught looking at her. He also mistakenly thought she had raised her hand to to  ask a question but it wasn't her it was someone sitting somewhere else.He ran outside to catch her one day to ask herthe name of the family member she needed help for.

Is if natural that some wives don't?

Most men I meet once they show their true colors I figure out they view women in a demeaning way and expect a woman to put up with their selfish rude nature while never acting that way back. They also value women primarily for their looks, sex and what they can do to serve them and are not interested in them as a person with needs that would require some selflessness on their part. They also view marriage as a prison sentence even though in reality the woman would be the prisoner because she'd be getting the raw end of the deal.

Due to the coronavirus, the Florida plant where my husband works, is saying they may shut down for months.

Because he isn't being sexually satisfied enough. Like he doesn't find her body attractive.. Does he have every right to divorce her or is it morally wrong of him? I mean I'm not really asking about legal rights here but more like in your moral code is he doing wrong? Is he a bad person? What do you think of power couples? Esp men who are interested in this kind of arrangement. Like when they hookup with a girl based more on the fact that she earns a high income and so does he... rather then attraction for her.

I have asked her about it she denied it but it's just strange how they sometimes they stare at each other an example today I saw them really close to each other at first they were sitting close but then her coworker pulls her chair together and were like hugging when they saw me they separated any advice please

A previous question was asked and got me thinking. To spare one's feelings it appears there are no limits. Let me explain: 1) married couple, one is bored, doesn't feel good > divorce > financial ruin > but hey, I feel better now. Look what happened to Amazon CEO.  She took like 20 billion.  They both feel better but at what cost ladies? The sky is the limit just to feel better.  No wonder you people are addicted to antidepressants and liquor.  Seems like the cheaper route to feel good. Am I on to something here?  Is this the elephant in the room?

I just got married 2 month ago to my husband. He has a 3 year old that he just got back from cps. Now he trying to be in control and i don't know how to discipline him. He talk back. Disrespect disobey . and he told me i not the boss. He is. Please help

Are you not entertain? Xavier constantly cooking up real stories for you. The problem I get from you ladies is that they are not seedy enough for your taste and I get that. Everybody a critic!! What do you suggesting? Thank you, Yor fren Xavier

I'm trying to picture how "marriage" is supposed to work after the honeymoon phase and it seems like a lot of complacency is expected so that way two people are not thinking about anything and they just mind numb their life together. Example 1: Have kids, both parents work (or one does but the other works by raising kids), working parent(s) come home and eat dinner then everyone watches TV and mind numbs the rest of the day. Bam, perfect marriage because no one talks about feelings or drama. Example 2: Have no kids, both spouses work, they go to the gym alone, they go to their board meetings or special interest groups alone, they come home and make dinner for themselves, and then they both sleep in the same bad. Bam, perfect marriage because neither person talked about feelings or drama except maybe gloated about their achievements. Example 3: Have kids moved out, both spouses work or are retired, they binge TV shows or they binge drink with guests over, then they sleep. Bam, perfect marriage because neither person talked about feelings or drama except maybe the drama they observed with their guests over. ......... I just feel like TV or "wining down" time is EMBEDDED in a "healthy" marriage. But what happens if the OCD crazed wife won't drink wine to turn the brain off? what happens if all the OCD crazed wife does is constantly think about how life could be better and she can't turn her brain off even with the TV on? There's no BAM, it's just an imperfect marriage.

I went through my husband's Google pics to find a photo of our vacation and found pics and videos of him masterbating. He says he didn't send them to anyone or post them on a dating site. But in all reality why would anyone take pics and videos to just delete? I'm now thinking he has a separate life other than ours? Has anyone ever had this happen? I'm losing sleep and I don't think he's being honest! Do men really take dick pics just to take them? Then delete them. 

So many people encourage people to divorce when the going gets tough, I don't understand it at all. Marriage is not supposed to be this perfect thing that you and the other person fit each other's hole in each other's lives (sometimes hearts); because no one is perfect. The edges may need rounding or the hole needs to become bigger/smaller. That's just how things go! So why the suggestion to divorce? For a bunch of people who are online to give advice and solutions, y'all are a bunch of "no drama" babies and it makes sense why the divorce rate is so high; y'all suck at keeping people together. Marriage rates have been dropping and that's the only reason divorce rates are dropping too; fewer people are getting married in the first place.

I told my wife that all this resent we both have for each other has to stop. It just has to stop. We aren't going to resolve it because to resolve it would require one of us confessing we started it, and since neither of us are going to do that, this is a "which came first - chicken or egg" situation, so we just need to drop our resent and just say "I choose to be happy with this relationship". I also told my wife that we need to agree to give each other 1 thing that we may have rejected/neglected on purpose because we were retaliating towards each other and withholding privileges to get back at the other person. And if we can both maintain that one thing then we'll move it to 2 things, then 3, then 4, then 5, until all the great things of being in a marriage are all restored. She seemed okay with this idea but we've done this before. I'll keep my end of the bargain (normally related to back rubs) and she won't keep hers because she'll either get lazy or she'll start to withhold again because she's mad at me and very very petty. So here's the question now, if she wants a 30 minute backrub every night, what should I ask for return? Keep in mind, we are in a sexless marriage right now and I'm miserably masturbating every day to keep myself happy because she won't participate in any attempts to create intimacy between us.

My ex and I have been coparenting our 2 kids (8&10). About 1-2x a week we spend the night (nothing sexual) and the kids love it. He takes Ambien to sleep and always goes to bed as soon as he takes it. On several occasions he's called me on the phone hallucinating after he has taken it. On night 2 of this stay, things were different. He took Ambien and fell asleep, our daughter accidentally made a loud noise that woke him up about an hour after he fell asleep. It was like a demon had waken up and not him. He was furious at me wanting to check my phone (we've been divorced 7 years). It was nonstop for over 3 hours and he kept telling our daughter that she was next (he has never even yelled at her before). In the 16 years that I've known him, not once has he showed this behavior. He's in the military about to retire and this would end his career. He has no recollection of anything that happened. I left with the kids and a few hours later he called asking where we went and like nothing happened. Our 8 year old recorded parts of what went on and when I sent the video he couldn't believe it. Has anyone had any similar experiences? I'll be contacting my attorney today but I'm still at a loss of what happened. I ended up with a hairline fracture to a rib and over 30 bruises. Our daughter wants nothing to do with him and is terrified of him now, every day they would talk and text non stop throughout the day but she can't stop crying as soon as she thinks of him. 

Short version of this story. I caught my wife having sex with another guy. She went into blame shifting and then the crying business because she was sooooo sorry, can I forgive her ect.. Um, nope. I deliberately set out to seduce her sister and had sex so that my soon to be ex wife found out. Delightfully it drove my ex nearly mad with jealousy and rage which I enjoyed tremendously. What was totally unexpected however was the sister and I are starting to actually fall in love and are seriously discussing marriage once I get divorced. Is that a happy ending or what? Just a side note, the new girl-friend sister is 6 years younger and way better looking than the cheating ex which makes this even richer...I think I hit the jackpot!

I want to get married, but I keep worrying that the first person I date won't become my spouse. And then all that time I spent with them will be time down the drain. Do you usually marry the first person you date?

My fiance was married for 18 years to ex. Both made excellent salaries.  He doesn't have a long life expectancy due to heart problems.  He told me his 401k worth over 1 mil goes to her. So does 1/2 mil life insurance.  His 1/3 mil house and savings goes to kids. I will be his wife  taking care of him as he fades. He doesn't feel the need to include me in anything financial. Because of his current health he'll never get a life insurance. We are in our 50's. Don't I deserve something especially since I will care for him when he's sick.?  I have a nobel, yet low paying career.  She made almost as much as him plus I suspect she has her own 401k. I have no money compared to either of them. I'm not marrying for money. I waited my whole life for him. He has the life insurance policy from 18 years ago before heart problem diagnosis. I just feel as his wife and eventual caregiver I deserve something. 

I've seen numerous posts from women who get highly upset when they find out their boyfriends or husbands took a day off work and didn't tell them. They felt like they were lied to. A woman can take a mental health day whenever she feels like it and the guy could care less but the minute he does it then she all of a sudden finds a list of things she wants him to do. I have unused PTO on my job that carried over from last year that if I don't use I'll lose it so I decided to take the day off. When I got home last night I mentioned it to my wife and now she is adding to my "honeydew" list of things to do. "Change the linen", "do this", "do that." This morning she mentioned that her 25 year old son was going downtown to some job interview and if he doesn't get the job then I need to go pick him up and take him home. My response to her was, "If I had went to work how would he have gotten home." Me taking the day off doesn't mean I want to be his free Uber or Lyft. It's funny how he can make it downtown but just can't seem to get back home. I'm thinking I should have lied by omission and not said anything about me taking the day off. No, I didn't agree to run my step-son around so now the wifey is peeved with me that her son will have to figure out how he's going to get home while I'm just sitting here doing nothing. What do you think?

It will never happen again. I don't want to feel like this again 😔