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Family
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Tuesday 29 May 2018

Family: Question: Disagreement with roommates: what do I do?

Family: Question: Disagreement with roommates: what do I do?


Question: Disagreement with roommates: what do I do?

Posted: 29 May 2018 11:36 AM PDT

I d been in charge of unloading the dishwasher for 4 months, and my roommates would always leave their dishes in the sink for days, so I just started doing them without complaining. Meanwhile, any time they do my dishes, they post angry messages (4 times now). They argue that, because dishes being left out doesn t bother me,they don t have to obey the rule they made that dishes can only stay in the sink for 16 hours. I argued that they should follow this rule too, but they would listen. I tried explaining their rule is hard. One day a week, I m either at work or on a bus for 16 hours. On that day, I get home 2 hours after I should be in bed, but I still need to eat. I throw something together and then pass out. But even after sharing this, they were insistent on this 16 hour window. I said that i have a mental illness, possibly from brain damage, that makes it hard for me to do things. They told me "i still don t get why you can t just do dishes." At this point, everything I m trying to argue is proof of my mental illness and that they should be respecting the rules too, but whenever I try to talk about these things, they keep jumping down my throat about dishes. And when I try to come up with a solution that helps everyone, they get angry about it like I m attacking them. (And while arguing, I ve been pushing myself to do the dishes on time, and they re still leaving their dishes out for 24+ hours.) So, other than moving out, what can I do to live with them?

Question: My aunt is a bully to people. My parents are mad I saw her. How do I respond to them using me as a pawn to get revenge?

Posted: 29 May 2018 11:34 AM PDT

It's my Mom's sister and my Mom sees her so I don't see why I should be grounded from seeing her. My mother expects me to forgive my toxic sister who has no values so why must I hate this aunt my Mom hates? How do I respond next time they try to hold me back from seeing this aunt that my Mom and Dad bullies back at. This is a game my Mom has played her whole life, the aunt plays the same game. I am an adult living on my own. Age 31. However, they live on the same block and my grandmother who my aunt stays with when she is in town so they know when I see her and caught me two weeks ago when I saw her.

Question: Do I have too visit my dad on Father's Day ?. .?

Posted: 29 May 2018 11:31 AM PDT

Question: Why does nobody let me be my own person?

Posted: 29 May 2018 11:08 AM PDT

They all expect me to live up to my mom, and treat me like the second coming of her.

Question: Parent thinks im a disappointment?

Posted: 29 May 2018 10:34 AM PDT

So I live w my aunt and uncle and my aunt thinks im a disappointment because I dont really talk a lot and thinks im gonna end up not going through w college. I have no intentions on giving up college lol and im doing everything right. I dont know why she says this maybe because i am doing things out of the ordinary like getting a nose piercing and one tattoo? I am 19 btw and i decided to get those because i like it. This is why i dont talk to her because she thinks low of me and i dont wanna be around that energy if that makes sense. I just wanna know what should i do? I wanna be able to act i would around my friends but everyone is so fake and criticize everything I do and now I got them thinking im depressed because of the way everyone acts around here. Mind you this is my "family" I am talking about.

Question: Should I quit my job even if I'm supporting my family?

Posted: 29 May 2018 07:42 AM PDT

My family and I are bouncing from hotel and vacation homes until we find a house to stay in, I've been helping out and so has my brother and his girlfriend. The only thing is a week prior to leaving the two of them decided to put thousands of dollar short down on a car they didn't need instead of paying 300 to get something fixed on their old car. The timing is just way off and once again they've made a lavish purchase when the family needed them. Well, I'm wanting to quit my job. I've become depressed, management is serious about disciplining bullies and I need to focus on my mental health instead of negativity. I've been working there for two years and finally feel as if it's time for me to leave. Right now I have no other jobs lined up and my mother said she'd rely on my brother and his girl to help out more as I should focus on school and my mental health. I appreciate this but I'm worried of the judgement that may come from my step father and my brother and his girl. I've helped out this family so much and have had to put my plans on hold due to that now they'd be doing the same but I can't help but feel guilty. I was looking for part time but I really want to focus on my schooling. The environment at work is so toxic and I feel disrespected and empty every time I step in the office I'm sorry I did not explain myself well. I work, my step father works and my brother and his girlfriend works as well. We all help out the household but my brother and his girlfriend made a lavish purchase when they knew we'd need their help so they contribute as best as they can. My mother is supportive of my choice to quit but my step father may have an issue with it as well as my brother and his girlfriend. Ultimately what my mother says goes in our household but I still guilty. It's ok, I'm 22 and its life. I've had a late start due to a bunch of things in the past but now I'm getting that in order.

Question: Do you think it's a good idea to have grandchildren be a primary caregiver for grandparent?

Posted: 29 May 2018 04:22 AM PDT

Question: What do I do about a narcissistic ex who is the father of my child?

Posted: 29 May 2018 01:02 AM PDT

The father of my child has been absent in my 9 year old daughters life for 4 years. For 4 years she did not receive any acknowledgement for her birthday or Christmas or any other time of the year. I would try reaching out to her dad for him to spend time with her but all we would do is argue and then he would ignore me and his daughter again. Finally timing worked out and he got his daughter for this Memorial weekend. They made up for lost time but when she came home she was crying hysterically saying how much she misses her dad already and blaming me for not seeing him in so long when I had been reaching out to him to spend time with her and knowing that he had the time available to spend time with her and he just chose not to. She was with him for 3 days and the whole time he was with her he blamed me for him being absent in her life. I defended myself and explained to her that he has no excuse for not being in her life all this time but she still blames me and says she doesn t know who to believe. He is a narcissist so he can be extremely charming and convincing but it s all lies. I hate that he lied to my daughter and that she believes his lies. What can I do to protect my daughter from being damaged? I feel like it was a mistake letting her to spend time with him because now he put bad thoughts about me in my daughter s mind and now she is stressed out about when she will see him next. Please any advice would be appreciated.

Question: Wisest advice anyone told you that makes sense and you use and is right?

Posted: 28 May 2018 11:49 PM PDT

Question: Should I talk to my son sternly about this (Parents, please give me your advice.)?

Posted: 28 May 2018 09:06 PM PDT

We were taking a family vacation and it was just the four of us.: Me, my wife, twelve year old son, and four year old daughter. We were taking my van to travel and my son brought a blanket for the trip. (I didn't think anything of it at first.) Anyways, my son sat in one of the individual seats alone and spread the blanket along himself. I didn't know what was going on, during the ride, but my son was acting suspiciously. Anyways, when we finally got out, my wife started scolding our son and from what I was told is that he had been masturbating under the blanket. He claims that he didn't pull down his pants and that he only used his hand over the sweatpants, but was using the blanket to avoid being caught. Anyways, I'm very confused and don't know how to confront him. Should I be stern about this? I've never had this talk with my son before, should I ground him for it?

Question: My parents are planning my grad party and I have an issue?

Posted: 28 May 2018 08:33 PM PDT

So I'm kinda picky when it comes to food because of sensory issues from adhd. My parents are planning my grad party, and there's going to be a lot of food there, but the main entree is shredded chicken, which I don't like because of the texture. I know it's hard for them to find something else that can feed a **** ton of people and is still cheap, but like... I don't think I should have to not have lunch at my own party. I suggested pizza and burgers but pizza is expensive and my dad can't cook burgers since he'll be recovering from surgery. My mom told me I just have to suck it up. What do I do? I don't want to sound ungrateful. I do appreciate my parents putting so much effort into planning this party. I know this is a really small thing, but it bothers me and idk what to do I guess I'm really asking a couple things here. Is there a way to bring this up with my parents without sounding ungrateful? Because I do appreciate it a lot. Also, does anyone have suggestions for other things she could make instead?

Question: Why do the seniors in high school like to be purposefully mean to the younger grades?

Posted: 28 May 2018 08:10 PM PDT

I'm glad they're graduating next month. They've been so salty to the younger people all year. They pull stupid pranks. Today was Senior Skip Day. It was a LOT quieter without those people!!! Because a lot of them are the ones who act snobby, exclusive and like playing authority. I've been trying to be nice for the whole year. I stayed out of their way and didn't make any comments when they had a "seniors only table". When it was a mixed age group situation, I tried being extra generous with them. It doesn't work with many people - it seems like seniors are the hardest people to get along with. They think everything is about them. The girls always have to dress/look prettier than the freshmen. The guys act much tougher and cooler than the freshmen, especially the basketball team. I know they do it on purpose - they don't behave that way with other seniors!! Just mostly freshmen and sophomores.

Question: Should I let grandma see her grandchild?

Posted: 28 May 2018 07:04 PM PDT

Long story short, my mother and I don't get along. In the past few months, my mom has threatend to stop paying rent whenever she gets upset at me for not making her feel 'welcomed enough'. She doesn't like how clean I am with the bathroom. Everytime it gets close to rent being due to the first, she finds a way to argue and grabs her bags and leaves without paying. Then she will come back later on and say sorry and help. She's left me hanging 3 times. Now this is the fourth. She has nowhere to officially go, she just works a lot and saves up her money. Anyway, I have a 4-year-old daughter. She has left us once again without a 30-day notice. My daughter has to now live with her father, and I have to go to a shelter since I have no other way out. She used my situation with me being a new graduate low /income against me. In the state of WA, there are no grandparent rights to children. My daughter's father is quite upset that she'd not leave a 30-day notice and leave her grandchild behind without a stable place. She somehow feels entitled to see a 4 year old she basically just put out of a home. Her father doesn't understand why she would want to see her grandchild after she just made the child homeless by not giving in her notice so I could get help on time. Should I let her see the child, or keep her away? My mom also said God is going to get me for not talking to her with respect. That was the last threat she left before slamming my apartment door. My question is, why or why shouldn't I let Grandma see my daughter after she walked out on our rent with a 30-day notice? What would be reasonable and yes I do have full custody. Dad has visitations and unfortunately, I had to be weak and vulnerable by telling him what happened so he could keep her while I try to get my stuff together. Last chance? Well, we are pretty much homeless now. So what chance? She just walked out on us for the 4th time today. lol How could she possibly care for her grandchild if she just walked out? Thankfully, her father was willing to take her in.

Question: Should I skip Father's Day project due to child's father passing last year, or have kids honor a Very Important Man instead?

Posted: 28 May 2018 06:05 PM PDT

Question: I don't want to go to high school in Silicon Valley. How do I convince my parents it's not a good fit for me?

Posted: 28 May 2018 05:42 PM PDT

I literally hate North CA. Silicon Valley is disgusting. The lack of diversity sickens me. I'm Indian-American and my parents are computer engineers so they work around here. I just can't stand it here. Everyone is obsessed with their grades, everyone's parents are pieces of ****. I want to go somewhere like LaGuardia High School, or hell, ANYWHERE BUT HERE. Even So-Cal.

Question: Why did my uncle give my dad a picture of a naked woman?

Posted: 28 May 2018 04:36 PM PDT

Like my uncle is cheating on his wife and he just gave my dad a picture of a naked woman so my dad can sell it or do whatever he like with it. Why?

Question: What is the best way to help my daughter?

Posted: 28 May 2018 04:17 PM PDT

My daughter Sadie (22) suffered a very traumatic miscarriage 2 months ago. She almost died. Ever since I've been doing everything I can to help her. She goes to therapy, she's been on a few anti-depressants, she has the love and support of all her friends and boyfriend. At first she was hideously depressed. Her aunt actually flew in from Australia to help. Luckily it got better. Then we flew to Australia for a few weeks to visit her dad which REALLY helped. I finally got my happy girl back. So she's doing good emotionally. She's going to work and everything, but there are still problems. 1:bladder control, and 2:she won't respond to her name. I could scream "Sadie" all day, and she wouldn't look. Her therapist can't come up with a solid answer or solution. That's very frustrating for me! I threatened to take her to a urologist which slightly helped with the bladder thing. However bladder control in general is still an issue for her. I don't know if she's simply ignoring it, or if there's nerve damage from the d&c. Her dr doesn't think thats possible. I don't know! That's why I'm asking. My sister and I've witnessed her grabbing herself, jumping around, clearly needing relief. But when asked about it, Sadie denies it. I've gotten to the point where I set a timer for every 3 hours and make her go. She's been tested for a uti, I can't get any answers. Sadie is a normal young lady usually. So this isn't like her. What can I do about these problems? I'm at my wits end!

Question: Evicting My Father? Bad or Good Idea?

Posted: 28 May 2018 03:56 PM PDT

Question: Dear parents...?

Posted: 28 May 2018 03:24 PM PDT

I'm 14 turning 15 in less than a month now and I wanted to go out with two 15 year old friends shopping in a mall (populated but not too busy area). My mother is fine with me going but my father refuses to let me go unless there is parental supervision. I understand that he is very protective but I just really want to go. I don't know what to do. I Googled the question above and it says that legally, there is no age. But how do I convince my parents that I won't die on the way there. We also might be going by bus and ughhh idk what to do.....cheers in advance. Ps..answers from actual parents would be lovely, but thank you to everyone

Question: Does this plan sounds logical?

Posted: 28 May 2018 02:57 PM PDT

I m 26 female, feel very old because these laast 5 years has consisted of failure, depression and isolation. I have a very toxic family and I m just trying to get away and start my life. My parents just got a new deal for their company and will be moving into a 5 bedroom home in Texas and all of my sisters, brothers, uncles, aunts and a few cousins are all promised jobs. My dad doesn t take me serious enough to offer me a job. He barely speak to me, he make me feel like I did something to him. I ve never been bad, I ve never disrespected him or my mom. He just more closer to my sisters and brothers. This year, I finally landed a job that I hate very much, but the pay is really good. But it was a temp job. I have saved $6,500 so far, the job ends in 3 weeks. There s another job in Chicago which is just 4 hours away from my hometown, and the job pays $800 weekly, dispatching for a truck company. I found a studio for $500/monthly, and I was thinking for the next 3 months I could save up more money on top of my savings with hopes to save atleast $11,000 and moved to LA for acting/photography. Am I too old?

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