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Family
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Tuesday 16 July 2019

Family: Question: Are My Parents Too Harsh On Me and are they “Toxic” people?

Family: Question: Are My Parents Too Harsh On Me and are they “Toxic” people?


Question: Are My Parents Too Harsh On Me and are they “Toxic” people?

Posted: 16 Jul 2019 02:45 PM PDT

Hi I'm a 16 y/o girl. I live with my mom, step-dad, 17 year old brother and two younger toddler brothers. I've asked my parents if I could have a phone & they've said no because I am irresponsible, don't do any after school activities, give attitude everytime I'm told to do a chore, & ungrateful for the things I already have When asked if I made a sports team would I get a phone my parents simply said no. I was confused but just brushed it off. I improved on everything else they had told me & it's a lot but it's too much to type (sorry). Basically they said they didn't notice my improvements and that I wasn't trying hard enough. My older brother has always gotten worse grades than me but his work ethic is stronger than mine. For my parents work ethic beats intelligence. My brother got a phone when he turned 13 for writing and essay on why he should have a phone. I was inspired and asked my mom "if I write an essay can i get a phone?" When I was 15. My mother replied "You do well in school, an essay would be too easy" I felt upset because I didn't know what to do in order to get a phone and at this point I was feeling deeply unfavored compared to my brother. My step father does not allow me to go anywhere ever. Seriously. My mom is more lenient towards that but she says she could care less about the unimportant aspects of my life so she goes along with whatever my step father decides when it comes to going out anywhere.

Question: How Do I Apologize?

Posted: 16 Jul 2019 02:05 PM PDT

About two weeks ago, my lovely wife of 20 years passed away. It's been a really hard time, especially for our two adopted Asian gymnast daughters Thai Lee and Trapeze. Anyhow, her funeral was two nights ago and I just can't seem to live with what I've done. In the midst of my grief, confusion, and sadness, I slept with one of her relatives. It was a spur of the moment mistake, but I still feel horrible. She was so close to her mother-in-law, and I can't believe I betrayed her trust. How can I apologize for what I've done if they still haven't even found her body? Thanks a mil!

Question: Is there something wrong with my uncle?

Posted: 16 Jul 2019 01:35 PM PDT

So I'm 15 and me and my dad just moved to a new state. While we are looking for houses we are staying at my dads friends house but I just call him my uncle at this point. He's a complete asshole to everybody. All he does is complain. And it's usually about the smallest things. Here are some examples. He yelled at me for 5 mins because I was sitting in bed with clothes on. A couple nights ago I only ate one chicken wing that he made and the next day he yelled at me and my dad because we didn't eat enough and said that he'll never cook for us again. I bumped into an ash tray and he called me a ******* klutz. I opened a water while I had another one open with just one swallow left. My dog stinks. And so on. Every day I get yelled at or teased at least 3 times. And he treats his closest friends the same way. And when I ask them about it they always just say "well that's just how he is." He yells at his wife over money problems in front of anyone that's near. He is just a dick. Is he bipolar or a Narcissist or what?

Question: Does my sister like me?

Posted: 16 Jul 2019 01:33 PM PDT

She gets mad at me for no reason, talks at me, slams the door on me, threatens me, ignores me. I feel like she hates me. She's been this way towards me ever since we were kids. The picture below is a picture of her.

Question: To loan money to my sister or not?

Posted: 16 Jul 2019 01:07 PM PDT

Hey all, I'm moving overseas soon and will temporarily be moving in with my sister's family till I settle in, find employment and then my own place. I don't have much just from the things I sold off back home. My sister is currently struggling and has been unemployed for 3-4 months and everyday she is getting out and trying to find work. She asked for a loan of $2,000 for her unpaid rent and other bills on top - I don't know if I should lend this to her or not? Considering she is letting me staying at her place and I'm contributing to board anyway. I don't have much and I need money to survive on my own. My cousin also loaned her $2,000 also and hasn't seen a dime from it. I need some thoughts and suggestion on this. Thanks.

Question: Should I punish my son for getting a tattoo?

Posted: 16 Jul 2019 12:27 PM PDT

My son is 16 and he got someone to get him a fake ID that says he's 18. It's not a small tattoo that is barely visible, it's a big one right in the middle of his chest. I just don't think think he's old enough to get tattoos, especially without my permission.

Question: What should I do?

Posted: 16 Jul 2019 12:18 PM PDT

I am going to be a junior in high school and I have a twin sister. We go to a private school that requires alot of academics, and my sister has always struggled to keep up. This year she has decided to not go to our private school anymore and go somewhere else. We have a lot of local high schools she could go to but she has pretty much decided to go out of state to live with our brother to go to high school. I feel like my parents are not thinking this fully through and I dont want her to go. Should I except the fact that she will be live thousands of miles away for the school year or should I give up a fight to keep her closer to home?

Question: My mother is irritated that i am nonchalant?

Posted: 16 Jul 2019 12:00 PM PDT

I'm a young teen. Still going through emotional phases and such. I'm an introvert. Im not overly loud or anyhting. My mom yelled at me and i didnt cry. She got angrier and slapped my glasses off of my face and i just put them back on. She bought me food after i said i wasnt hungry and already ate. She got angry at me fpr not eating the food even though i said i was not hungry and said she wasted her money. I agreed. She called me stupid. Today she told me that i've been very rude to her this week and she doesnt appriciate my attitude/being so nonchalant/calm. Is there something wrong with me? Something wrong with my mother? Im confused and a little upset. Any advice? How do i tell her im not trying to be rude by being calm? I just dont like confrontation. I'm 14.

Question: Do I have reason to be depress?

Posted: 16 Jul 2019 11:10 AM PDT

My father is literally the cause of all my depression, hes a terrible person I cant and dont know how to go into to detail but hes horrible, but unfortunately he has a lot of money and hes going to leave it all for my brother when he dies. We used to be fine but ever he literally out of the school blue just changed on me for no reason. I dont even know how to unpack whats going ono between me and him. I get so sad and depress all the time and that is one the things that gets me sad. I have other things that get me sad too, please let me know in the answers if you want to know what else gets me sad.

Question: My daughter wants to go to college in Las Vegas?

Posted: 16 Jul 2019 09:52 AM PDT

But the problem is that we can't afford it. She wants to go to University of Nevada, Las Vegas but the out of state tuition is 3 times the in state tuition. Would it be worth it to co-sign a loan for her to go there? It's the place she really wants to be.

Question: My ex told my 13y/o "it's ok to do drugs". Any advice.?

Posted: 16 Jul 2019 08:13 AM PDT

My ex-husband told our 13 y/o son (who has no prior interest in the topic or drug use) that it's ok to do drugs. Long story short, my ex started exploring drugs when he was 13 and his parents didnt take it well so he fowed to have this "talk" with his own kids at this age. Apparently, he pulled my son aside on his 13th birthday and essentially told him it was totally ok. Even when he said, he never took drugs and doesnt want to, he put a major emphasis that was translated in my son's word to "go ahead and try drugs". Two months later here my son is with some drug (I dont even know what it is) hidden in his room. Naturally as a mom and a mature adult in general, I asked my son about it and that's how the incident with his dad came up. When I asked my ex about it, he didnt deny any of it, and just said "he misunderstood my point". Now I'm living a paranoia now that he's been introduced to it, I have to constantly check his room bc his genuine argument is "dad said I could". I infuriates me to my core. I want to un-teach him about drugs and I'm obviously the bad guy now. I considered letting his father talk to him about it and clean his own mess up but I honestly cant even trust him tbh. Any advice.

Question: My dad is trying to reach out to me but I’m not happy about it?

Posted: 16 Jul 2019 08:01 AM PDT

My dad is gay and married my stepdad about ten years ago. Neither of them liked me very much. I was always the "black sheep" of the family, excluded from family activities, etc. There are definitely people that had it way worse than me, but I grew up in an abusive household - I've had my fair share of being thrashed around as a kid and screamed at and called names for no reason. It got so bad - the last two years of high school I made sure I was almost never home. Always busy doing after school activities or working. Now I'm in college and my parents don't make much of an effort to contact me. I kind of get ignored which is fine by me. But all of a sudden my dad keeps asking about getting lunch with him sometime? Idk if he feels bad that he just stood by while his husband estranged me from the family or what - but I really don't want much to do with them. I want to be really mad and hurt his feelings like they did mine for 10 years - but I'm just not like that. I pity him if anything. Any advice?

Question: How would you react if your teenage daughter skipped school because of bullying?

Posted: 16 Jul 2019 05:15 AM PDT

Question: Is the parents are smart, will the children likely be smart?

Posted: 16 Jul 2019 05:14 AM PDT

If both parents graduated from Brown, what are the chances of their children being smart?

Question: My mother wont let me get married because they think I can't clean good enough?

Posted: 16 Jul 2019 03:33 AM PDT

I have a strange problem. My mother has an obsession with cleaning, kind of like OCD. I want to be able to leave home and get married when I'm 20 but my mother's only excuse is that im not a good enough cleaner. Now I wouldn't say I'm as clean as her but i most certainly keep things clean and tidy. I believe she has a fear of me growing up and leaving home. I am working full time and plan to move out soon. But whenever I talk about it she is get angry and say that I'm not good enough to leave her.

Question: What should you say if your wife keeps hanging out with high school girls in her free time?

Posted: 16 Jul 2019 02:34 AM PDT

Question: Why does my moms bf acts like he’s my dad ??? I’m so tired of her and it annoys me that he’s trying to act like he’s my dad when idk him?

Posted: 15 Jul 2019 10:07 PM PDT

Question: Should I admit that my parents are evil?

Posted: 15 Jul 2019 07:30 PM PDT

My parents are the people who when I was six years old till today still drug me for no reason and drug him every morning and night. I really need help here...

Question: My mom is incredibly spiteful towards my stepdaughter. What should I do?

Posted: 15 Jul 2019 07:20 PM PDT

My wife has a child from a previous relationship. The dad is not in the picture, and we've been together since the child was 4 months old. She's now almost three. My wife and I also have a daughter together. My mom, for no reason, can't stand my stepdaughter, and is just openly rude. She won't hold her or talk to her. She even said "that IS NOT my grandchild" right in front of her. Because of this, I don't bring either of the kids around her. I've told my mom how inappropriate her actions are, and she won't budge on her opinion. What should I do?

Question: Would it be okay to call my boyfriend’s parents by their first names?

Posted: 15 Jul 2019 07:01 PM PDT

I'm meeting them for the first time. Since I'm 19 and an adult, would it be okay if I say, "Hello Annie and Jonathan nice to meet you"?

Question: An uncle of mine stumped on my foot and my toe is inflamed 4 weeks later. What do I do? Do I have him arrested?

Posted: 15 Jul 2019 06:55 PM PDT

Question: My Dad is a very ignorant person, how do I get him to change?

Posted: 15 Jul 2019 06:55 PM PDT

Question: Is it rude of me that I find it annoying when my mom does this?

Posted: 15 Jul 2019 06:48 PM PDT

I started a new job recently. Every single day after work, she asks me "how was work? Do you like it?". Every single day.

Question: How to deal with an entitled/spoiled younger sibling?

Posted: 15 Jul 2019 06:02 PM PDT

I am 17F and my brother is 14M and he is EXTREMELY spoiled. He thinks everything is his (my stuff and my sister's stuff) and he is very petty. He used to go in my room and steal/damage my stuff (he poured mod podge on my $40 headphones I paid for). As usual my parents didn't care but they finally let me have a door lock. Now that he can' steal/break stuff he constantly finds ways to get me in trouble. A few days ago he lied I stole $20 from him in attempt to make me give him money (he is OBBSESSED with money and steals it from my mom often and he has stolen hundreds of dollars from my grandma in the past) and today he went into the laundry room and took a picture of my laundry and said I would break the washing machine since I had a little amount of clothes (it was around half full) which resulted in me getting in trouble. He is so entitled he bought Mcdonalds with his own money and started complaining about how it's not fair how he should spend his own money and my mom should pay for everything. Ok enough ranting, point is how do I deal with him when he constantly does petty stuff to me and always getting me in trouble? My mom ALWAYS sides with him and views him as an innocent and that I am bullying him (which isn't true I tried hanging out with him but he turned around and threw a ton of sand in my bed). I now just don't talk to him (when I do he laughs at me and says rude stuff or brings up me paying for something) Sorry I typed so much, I'm just really mad at the moment!

Question: My boyfriend hates my family. How can I fix this?

Posted: 15 Jul 2019 05:42 PM PDT

He doesn't even want to come to my house anymore. He can't stand my family. And to be honest I don't blame him one bit. My mother is a pathological liar who has been diagnosed with several mental disorders and refuses treatment, so they're just getting worse. My father is abusive (although that's mostly stopped now that I'm older). My parents do nothing but fight (sometimes physically) all the time. I COMPLETELY understand why he doesn't like being around them but his hate for them is ruining our relationship. I'm working part time so I can pay for college tuition so I'm not in the best position to move out right now, that's just not an option. I want to get away from my family but we just can't afford that right now. He's very upset all the time and tells me he's so uncomfortable around my family and wants nothing to do with them. I don't know what to do. Nothing I say will console him. He's so scared that they're going to "ruin his life forever." What am I supposed to do in this situation? I completely understand his POV but I can't afford to move away from my family right now.

Question: How do i get my mom's attention?

Posted: 15 Jul 2019 04:07 PM PDT

My mom won't talk to me and I've been really depressed. She won't answer my calls. How do i get her to talk to me or answer? She's only 46 and I'm 21. I live in another state. Miles away. Should i have someone check on her? I'd call my step dad but he kinda hates me. He'd probably be angry at me for calling. Should i do it anyway? We haven't talked in over 10 days. I'm worried I'm supposed to be coming back to her state soon. What do i do?

Question: Emotional abuse question from mother?

Posted: 15 Jul 2019 03:45 PM PDT

Basically, I just graduated with my bachelor's degree and just got a job. Long story short, my mother offered me to stay at her house for free for one year for me to save money for my future house. But she emotionally abuses me calling me fat, ugly, saying all my ideas are stupid and that I'm delusional. My question is, would you accept her offer if you were in my shoes or would you just leave and pay for a cheap apartment?

Question: Should I charge my son rent?

Posted: 15 Jul 2019 03:37 PM PDT

My son is almost 23, just graduated college, and is still living at home. Should I begin charging him rent for him to live here?

Question: I'm pregnant but there's no space for the baby?

Posted: 15 Jul 2019 03:04 PM PDT

I'm 17 and pregnant. I live with my mom and 2 sisters in a 2 bedroom apartment. My mom and younger sister share a room and I share a room with my other sister. I don't want to move in with my dad because he's emotionally abusive which is why my mom divorced him. Should I leave home and go to a shelter?

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